KELLER’S WWE RAW REPORT 3/12: Reigns complains about being disrespected by Vince McMahon for Lesnar situation, plus Asuka, Miz TV with Seth and Balor, Tag Team Battle Royal

KELLER’S WWE RAW REPORT
MARCH 12, 2018
DETROIT, MICH.
AIRED LIVE ON USA NETWORK

Announcers: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman

[HOUR ONE]

-Kurt Angle walked out as the announcers talked about the Ronda Rousey mixed tag match at WrestleMania. He said he is honored to be competing at WrestleMania with Rousey as his partner. He shifted to talking about the Universal Title match at WrestleMania. He said unfortunately Brock Lesnar won’t be there tonight because of transportation issues or wasn’t feeling well “or he just decided not to show.” He said regardless they’ll have a great time tonight. He began to talk about Miz TV when Roman Reigns’s music interrupted.

Cole wondered what Reigns was thinking about Lesnar’s no-show tonight. Reigns asked Angle what kind of penalty there will be. “Don’t answer because I will – there won’t be because he’s Vince’s boy,” he said. When Angle reached for the mic, Reigns pulled back and told Angle, “Don’t touch my microphone.”

Reigns asked the fans what would happen if they didn’t show up for work. He asked Angle what would happen if he didn’t show up for his duties. “They’d fire y’all,” he said. “What would happen to me or anyone else in that locker room? Best case scenario, we’d get a huge fine; worst case scenario, we can’t feed our kids now.” Reigns said Angle isn’t the problem, he’s just the middle-man, and the real problem is Vince McMahon.

http://www.wwe.com/videos/roman-reigns-sounds-off-on-mr-mcmahon-raw-march-12-2018

(Keller’s Analysis: There are so many things going on here. One, WWE is getting too heavy-handed in the burial of Lesnar now so I’m thinking this is going to now backfire. Second, Reigns calling Lesnar “Vince’s boy” goes against the knowledge of the audience WWE is trying to get to give Reigns a break and cheer for. Fans who boo Reigns also know that Reigns is Vince’s boy, and Lesnar is a special attraction who is difficult for Vince to work with. Third, I didn’t think Reigns came across as a respectful when he snapped at Angle and said “don’t touch my microphone.” This is where Reigns stumbles as a babyface act because he just turns into a self-entitled jerk sometimes even when that’s not his intent at all. I get Angle was trying to cover his mic, and Reigns was worked up, but Angle has been portrayed in the Ronda Rousey storyline as a guy fighting against The Authority and putting himself as risk, so Reigns should have been in more of a bonding mode with Angle that he understands what it’s like to be on the wrong side of the McMahons instead of treating him as some kind of compromised sellout. Subtlety is not Vince McMahon’s speciality, and this is an example of the price he pays for that.

And the line about “not feeding his kids” – all athletes who have ever earned seven figures need to stop staying that if they lose their jobs their kids will starve – because there’s not a person they are aiming those comments at who would ever have to worry about feeding their kids if they earned $1 million in one year much less millions year after year, so either the celebrity is overpaying really badly for food and totally lacks judgment or that celebrity is frivolous with money to the point that no one is going to feel sorry for them having to get a “regular job” to “feed their kids” or they’re trying to cry poor and using their kids to make a point when they’re actually really rich. And finally, Kurt Angle has been portrayed as a stand-up babyface in recent weeks on TV, so Reigns acting like a jerk toward Angle – even if that’s not his intent – also backfires because right now Angle is a more sympathetic figure than Reigns. This is why fans booing Reigns isn’t something that is inevitable in a “Cena/Internet fan era” for any top babyface act; the boos of Reigns are a product of how he comes across time after time after time after time when on TV and on mainstream media interviews. He just doesn’t have a good sense of how he comes across.)

Now that WWE continues to push hard that Brock Lesnar lacks worth ethic and loyalty toward WWE, how would this affect YOUR reaction to ROMAN REIGNS at #WM34? #RAW

— Pro Wrestling Torch (@PWTorch) March 13, 2018

Reigns said the man he just walked past before he walked out there didn’t even have the courtesy or respect to tell him to his face. “That’s a man I bust my ass for, I travel all over the world. I’m not at home the majority of the year for him and his company,” he said. “It’s one thing to be disrespected by Brock Lesnar, but I will not be disrespected by Vince McMahon.” He dropped the mic and left. Cole said you can understand how Reigns feels. Graves said he is irate for good reason, but he hope she doesn’t do anything stupid.

They showed Reigns barged backstage to the Gorilla position (where for some reason Smackdown Commissioner Shane McMahon was sitting next to Vince). He got in Vince’s face and asked why he doesn’t respect him after all of these years. Vince said he’d talk in his office and he called for a commercial.

(Keller’s Analysis: This seems like a set-up for Reigns to quit or do something to get suspended. I also always question the prudence of turning the company heel. Fans are supposed to feel good about supporting WWE and this just makes them seem like they’re supporting a terribly corrupt organization that mistreats and disrespects the stars they’re conditioned to cheer and admire. And Shane sitting next to Vince seems like it was meant to give off the “vibe” of this being a shoot – like viewers are supposed to think, “If this was planned, there’s no way they’d have the Smackdown commissioner shown backstage at Raw!”) [c]

-Renee Young stood outside of Vince McMahon’s office. She said it sounded like things got heated, but not completely out of hand, and seems to have settled down in the last 30 seconds or so. Reigns then came out of the office and he looked disgruntled. He ignored her question.

(Keller’s Analysis: Again, here’s a chance for Reigns to not be a dick and just acknowledge Renee and say politely, “Not now, Renee. Not now.” But do so in a way that conveys that he respects she’s just doing her job. But he treated her like she wasn’t even there.)

Vince stepped out and actually addressed Renee’s question. Vince said, “Brock Lesnar is not my boy, Brock Lesnar is not Paul Heyman’s boy, Brock Lesnar isn’t anybody’s boy. He’s his own man.” He said he had no intention to disrespect Reigns. He said he thinks he’s a great competitor. He reminded him of something he didn’t want to hear in his office – something that his cousin The Rock used to say: “Know your role and shut your mouth.” Vince acknowledged that Brock has certain privileges. He said Brock doesn’t like people. He said that doesn’t make him a bad guy. “Does he respect the WWE Universe? Probably not.” (Boy does that sound so stupid.) “The one thing Brock Lesnar respects more than anything else is competition inside the ring and inside the Octagon.” He said he thinks Brock has earned those advantages and he can sometimes get out of line. Vince said Brock will be on Raw next week “and I assure you Brock will compete for the Universal Championship against Roman Reigns,” he said. Vince said you have his word on it. Vince said regarding the word respect, based on what just happened, Reigns has been “temporarily suspended.”

---

NOTE: If you have questions or a reaction to tonight’s Raw, send it to wadekellerpodcast@pwtorch.com for the Mailbag Segment of the #WKPWP taped tonight and available a couple hours after Raw ends. Search “Wade Keller” to subscribe to our podcast just about anywhere. Choose the red logo for the “Post-Shows” early this week and the blue logo for the “Flagship” and “Interview Friday” later this week.

Or call in live right after Raw ends: (347) 215-8558 to listen or participate.

---

(1) SONYA DEVILLE (w/Mandy Rose, Paige) vs. SASHA BANKS (w/Bayley)

They cut to an early break. [c]

After the break, the announcers talked about how Asuka challenging Charlotte last night opens the field for contenders to establish they deserve the title shot against Alexa Bliss at WrestleMania. The overuse of announcers saying “the grandest stage of them all” in place of saying “WrestleMania 34” is just obnoxious not even 30 minutes into this show. Deville took over control after the break with help from cohorts at ringside. Sasha made a comeback and scored a near fall. Mandy leaped on the ring apron to distract Sasha, but Bayley yanked her off the ring apron. Sasha noticed, seemed to appreciate it, and then put Deville in her Bank Statement for the win.

WINNER: Sasha in 7:00.

-Bayley let out a sigh and walked to the back, seeming to be a conflicted or even a lost soul at this point. Then Absolution stepped on the ring apron and surrounded Banks. Graves said Bayley left Sasha in the deep end. Sasha threw the first punch, but was soon overwhelmed by all three heels. Coach said they’ve become confident and dominant. Graves wondered where Bayley was in these last couple minutes.

-They went to the announcers on camera. Cole announced that Kid Rock was being inducted into the Celebrity Wing of the WrestleMania Hall of Fame. A video aired showing various celebrities who had been inducted in the past. The video touted the partnership between Kid Rock and WWE spanning the last two decades. It listed some of his accomplishments and record sales. Kid Rock has performed music at WWE events more often than anyone else including Raw, Tribute to the Troops, and WrestleMania. Then clips aired of “American Badass” Undertaker coming out to Kid’s music.

-Graves said Asuka “shocked the world and showed up at Fastlane” and declared she’ll face Charlotte at WrestleMania. He said she’d explain her decision later. Coach plugged Miz TV coming up next. [c]

-Miz stood mid-ring and got booed. He asked fans, “Tell me how you really feel.” He said he is without the Miztourage because they’re wrestling later and have a chance to punch their ticket to WrestleMania. “My little boys are all growns (sic) up. It just goes to show if you hang with Miz, I will elevate your career.” He said his guests are “the men Angle seems hell bent on giving opportunity after opportunity.” He said defeating them will be his final hurdle in becoming the longest-reigning Intercontinental Champion of all-time. He introduced Seth Rollins first. Then Finn Balor.

Miz tried to get Seth to turn against Balor. He said that he and Seth are the work horses of WWE, and Balor keeps getting in his way of the one-on-one match he desires. Seth asked who he’s trying to fool. Miz said Balor is “The Man… in Bingo Halls.” Miz said Balor’s WWE resume is lacking, but two years ago he did defeat Seth to become the first-ever Universal Champion. He said that was a huge accomplishment. He continued to butter up Balor. Balor told Miz he literally just tried that with Seth and he’s not a fool who would buy it. Miz told Seth that he should admit that he resents Balor for costing him the Universal Title. Miz told Balor that Seth, once you lower your guard around him, will stab you in the back. “Just as The Shield,” he said.

Seth told Miz to shut up because they are all ready fired up and don’t need him to help. He said in four weeks, he’s going to be beat him and take that Intercontinental Title. He told Balor, “I’m sorry, bud, you don’t stand a chance.” Balor laughed and asked Seth what happened last time they had a championship match. The crowd oohed. Balor said, “Oh, that’s right. I beat you with one arm.” Seth said that’s the past and he’s all about living in future – and in four weeks he’ll stomp his head into the mat on his way to becoming the IC Champion.

Balor told Seth they don’t have to wait four weeks. He stood up and kicked aside his stool. Miz smiled and moved out of the way. Miz led “Yes!” chants as Seth stood up. Coach said he feels like Miz in that he’d love to see that match, too. They turned and looked at Miz, realizing how he manipulated them. They worked together to beat up Miz, but then Seth blindsided Balor with a clothesline. Cole said that’s what the match at WrestleMania will be all about – “every man for himself!”

(Keller’s Analysis: As much as Balor and Seth looked like they were on to Miz’s attempts to divide them, in the end they still let them divide them. I get it’s “necessary” to have Seth and Balor seem at odds in the Triple Threat or else Miz could be in a sympathetic situation with two foes united, but it’s hard to accomplish that without making Balor and Seth seem like they’re being played a bit. This seemed to try to fine a middle ground.)

-Graves said Cena will be by later “to address his potential path, if any, to WrestleMania.” [c]

(2) THE BAR (Cesaro & Sheamus) vs. MIZTOURAGE (Bo Dallas & Curtis Axel)

Cole said The Bar trolled on Twitter all week and Miztourage responded. Coach said unlike the Keyboard Warriors out there, The Bar can back up every single word. Miztourage attacked The Bar from behind before the bell. Sheamus had the biggest mohawk yet. Dash & Dawson attacked The Bar before the bell. Out came Heath Slater & Rhino and Titus & Apollo. A battle royal-style brawl broke out. Coach said everybody answered the challenge. Cole said the locker room is teaching The Bar a lesson. “What, to not be so good?” asked Graves. Cesaro jumped over the ringside barrier. Cole said: “Cesaro now in retreat through the WWE fans.” (Will he be fined for not saying “through the WWE Universe?” Was that a slip-up or is Cole a conscientious objector to WWE’s Orwellian corporate speak?) Cole said this served The Bar right after running their mouths.

WINNER: No match.

(Keller’s Analysis: They can extend WrestleMania to 8 hours and have a one hour gauntlet match for the WWE Raw Tag Team Titles now!)

-Cole plugged that “a devastated Cena is live next.” [c]

-John Cena made his ring entrance.

[HOUR TWO]

-Cena said he has finally found his path to WrestleMania. He said it’s a bit different and not ideal, but after all he’s been through, he’s brave enough to face the truth. He said the truth is he’s had opportunity after opportunity on both brands and he tried his hardest but didn’t get the job done. He said he has no excuses and no one to blame but himself. He said it is every Superstar’s dream to contribute to WrestleMania. (Talk about Orwellian Corporate Speak. Now wrestlers aren’t fighting for themselves or for championships anymore, but rather to just play their part in the Grandest Stage of Them All and help WWE get bigger and better and more profitable.) A loud “Un-der-taker!” chant broke out. Cena stopped, took off his hat, and said, “That’s very kind of you.” He pointed at the back and said, “I hope they’re listening.” He said he will not contribute to WrestleMania this year. The crowd gasped and booed (certainly many just “playing along”). He said that doesn’t mean he quit or is walking away or even that he’s going to miss WrestleMania. He said he will be there, but his Road to WrestleMania “is now the same as yours.”

He said he’s benefited from their enthusiasm and now he’ll be part of it. He said he’s not going with a “boo boo face,” but rather ready to have a great time. He said he might end up sitting next to them. He went into the crowd and took a sip of a fan’s beer and said, “This is great! This is awesome!” He started a “This is awesome!” chant. Fans joined in. He tried to start a “Let’s Go Roman!” chant. That turned into a brief explosion of boos. (That was counter-productive.)

He re-entered the ring and started the “Let’s Go Cena! / Cena Sucks!” dueling chant. The fans were happy to join in. Cena said, “That actually feels as good as that sip of beer. Thank you, bro. I appreciate it.” He said now he’s tempted to say something he’s not supposed to. He asked what’s the worse thing that could happen. He said it wouldn’t change his Road to WrestleMania. He then said, “Screw it, I challenge the Undertaker to a match at WrestleMania.” The fans cheered. Cena acted like the ground was moving under his feet. Fans chanted “Yes! Yes!” He said he was told it was impossible even though the fan in him wants to see it. He said he just accepted it and never asked why. He wondered if WWE executives didn’t want it. He said they could cut his mic off and escort him out if they wanted or suspend him like they did Reigns. He challenged Taker again. And again. His mic stayed live. He said his mic is still on and he’s still there, so it’s not WWE or the fans keeping it from happening. He said the only person keeping it from happening is the Undertaker himself. Oooh’s from the crowd.

Cena addressed Taker. “Get over your own ego,” he said. “You see, the difference between you and me is that when I fail, I get back up, I put a smile on my face, and I go to work to kick ass the next day. When you fail, you hide your head in shame, never to be seen again because you’re ashamed of what people will say about you. Amazing a symbol so strong is really so fragile. Stop hiding behind your lame excuses. You are not too old, you are not washed up, you are not broken down – because if you were broken down, you wouldn’t be posting workout videos on your wife’s Instagram. The only person stopping this match from happening is you, you self-centered, conceited, egomaniac.” He said if it takes feeding his ego, he’ll do his best. He asked the fans if they want to see Undertaker kick his ass at WrestleMania. Cheers. Cena stared at the camera and said the fans want to see it “and I’d like to see ya’ try it.” He said he’s either going to WrestleMania as a fan or he’s going as Undertaker’s opponent “which will be history.” He said the ball is in Undertaker’s court. “Time to see if you’re still alive,” he said. He said if he were Taker, he’d want “one more match.” He threw the mic up and left.

(Keller’s Analysis: Quintessential Cena. At least we’re past moping desperate Cena looking for a Road to WrestleMania.) [c]

-The Bar complained to Angle backstage. Angle said they asked for it on social media. Sheamus said they were looking for competition, not to have every team attack them. Cesaro said they don’t feel safe on Raw if management doesn’t support them. Sheamus said they’ve heard rumors of a Superstar Shake-up after WrestleMania, but they want to be traded right now. Sheamus called out The Bludgeon Brothers. Cesaro called out New Day. Sheamus brought up the Usos. “Think about it, WrestleMania – champions vs. champions!” Cesaro said they’d take on Breezango. Sheamus said he knows they’re not wanted. Angle said there’s no way he’s trading them. Angle said they’ll get Raw opponents at WrestleMania and it will be determined in a Raw Tag Team Battle Royal Tonight.

-They went to the announcers on camera. Graves said The Bar already defeated all the teams on Raw, so they can kick back and relax and watch the Battle Royal. Cole threw to a highlight package on the Elias-Braun Strowman angle last week. He said it was the most talked about happening on Raw last week on social media.

-Elias played guitar under a spotlight in the middle of the ring. He said he has one question for everyone tonight. “This is your fault,” he said, looking downhearted. He got up and left the ring before singing. Coach asked what he meant by that. Elias began to walk to the back. Graves said he’s unable to practice what he loves to do.

-They cut backstage to Braun Strowman who said last week he dropped a PIANO (All Caps means the word flashed on the screen) on Elias. Yes, a PIANO!! He asked how is it that he doesn’t have a match at WrestleMania. He said he won’t beg and plead and wait for someone to show him his path. He said he’ll carve his own PATH OF DESTRUCTION. He guaranteed someone is going to GET THESE HANDS at WrestleMania.

-Graves hyped Seth vs. Balor up next. [c]

(3) FINN BALOR vs. SETH ROLLINS

Graves said Seth, despite losing big matches recently, has been on a hot-streak in terms of how he’s been performing. Balor dropkicked Seth off the ring apron and hard into the ringside barrier a few minutes in. They cut to a break. [c]

Back from the break, Seth had Balor in a chinlock. Cole said Miz said on social media last week that Balor is going around saying “Too sweet!” and wearing a “stupid leather jackets like it’s the 1900s.” (This seems like an attempt by Vince McMahon, via Miz, to try to take away the cool factor from the Bullet Club, but there’s a little bit of biting off his nose to spite his face at work here if it takes away from Balor; Miz being the guy issuing the insults means Balor is probably going to be just fine.) They showed Miz watching the match on a monitor backstage. Balor avoided a Seth charge into the corner and then kicked him. Seth set up a superplex, but Balor blocked it. Balor climbed to the top rope, but Seth leaped back up and superplexed Balor. Balor, though, small packaged Seth for the three count. Cole said Seth appeared to be looking to roll through for the Falcon Arrow. Graves said Balor knows Seth’s tendencies. Coach said Seth shouldn’t go home upset, but rather should learn something from it.

WINNER: Balor in 15:00.

-Cole said they had a tribute to Fabulous Moolah as part of the Road to WrestleMania. The narrator compared Moolah to other female athletes of her era. Beth Phoenix, Trish Stratus, and Stephanie McMahon talked about her trailblazing career. It also noted she was the first woman inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame and the only woman to win the Women’s Title at age 75. Bayley, Sasha Banks, Natalya, Naomi, and Charlotte soundbites aired. There will now be a Fabulous Moolah Invitational Battle Royal at WrestleMania.

-Back to the announcers, Graves couldn’t have looked more excited and proud of this latest step in the Women’s Evolution. [c]

-The announcers threw to a video package on the Rousey mixed tag match clocking in at five minutes.

(Keller’s Analysis: If you haven’t seen that video package yet, I suspect WWE will gladly send someone to your house and show you on an iPad in person.)

-They showed Asuka backstage. [c]

---

NOTE: If you have questions or a reaction to tonight’s Raw, send it to wadekellerpodcast@pwtorch.com for the Mailbag Segment of the #WKPWP taped tonight and available a couple hours after Raw ends. Search “Wade Keller” to subscribe to our podcast just about anywhere. Choose the red logo for the “Post-Shows” early this week and the blue logo for the “Flagship” and “Interview Friday” later this week.

Or call in live right after Raw ends: (347) 215-8558 to listen or participate.

---

[HOUR THREE]

-Asuka made her ring entrance. Charlie Caruso interviewed Asuka mid-ring. She said “everyone is dying to know why” she chose Charlotte. As Asuka began two speak, Alexa interrupted. (If you were shocked by this interruption, you are a first-time Raw viewer.) Bliss and Mickie James walked out. Bliss said Asuka’s English isn’t great, so she’ll explain it for everyone. Bliss entered the ring and said two weeks ago she defied all the odds at Elimination Chamber and defeated five fellow Superstars and a future Hall of Famer. Mickie thanked Bliss for the shout out. Bliss said she has redefined what it means to be Women’s Champion. She told Asuka she knows she can’t beat her at WrestleMania so she’s avoiding the fight altogether. She said it’s a smart strategy and she’ll be rooting for her to knock the queen off her throne. She applauded Asuka for “choosing the champion of the B-show.” Asuka said, “I chose Charlotte because to be The Woman, you got to beat The Woman!” She said she wants to beat the best champion in WWE.

Bliss said this must be one of those language barrier things because she’s screaming right in her face. Bliss said what she’s really saying is she chose the weaker champion to face. Asuka said she beat her before and she’ll beat her again. She got a bit spazzy. Mickie and Alexa had a brief conference. Alexa shoved Asuka. Mickie then attacked her. Cole called it a cheap shot. Mickie bent over and trash-talked Asuka and challenged her. Cole’s voice squeaked as he said, “Are they going to fight?” [c]

(4) MICKIE JAMES vs. ASUKA

Cole said Angle made this match official during the break. He wondered what would happen to Asuka’s confidence if her streak ended tonight. Graves said it could destroy her psyche and thus her chances against Charlotte. Asuka came back at 2:o0 with a hip attack. She knocked Mickie to the floor. When she got back up on the ring apron, Asuka gave her a running kick. Asuka went after Mickie at ringside again a minute later. She stopped Mickie from escaping into the crowd and threw her head-first into the ring. She kicked at her, but Mickie moved and Asuka sold an injured leg after striking the ringpost. The ref began to count. Cole said a countout loss would stop the streak. Asuka rolled into the ring, but Mickie went after her ankle aggressively. Cole said Asuka cannot afford a leg injury heading into WrestleMania because Charlotte’s signature move is a Figure-Eight. Asuka made a comeback with a surprise move, but Mickie countered into a leverage near fall. Asuka stood and kicked Mickie in the head. Both went down and were slow to get up.

Asuka stood and delivered some spinning elbows and a flying elbow into the corner. Asuka then kneed Mickie in the face and scored a near fall. Mickie made a comeback and kipped up. She climbed to the top rope, but Asuka knocked her off balance. Mickie fought back and sunset flipped Asuka off the top rope for a near fall. Mickie went for a second cover right away and scored another two count. She went for the Mick Kick, but Asuka ducked and put her in the Asuka Lock. Mickie tapped out.

WINNER: Asuka in 7:00.

-Cole asked Graves to explain the Woken Matt Universe to him. Graves said he’s not Woken yet, but he can try. He said they’ve arranged a preview of Ultimate Deletion tonight. Coach plugged the tag team battle royal later.

-They went backstage where Nia Jax was looking in the mirror preparing to go out. In walked Alexa. “Where the hell were you?” Alexa asked. Jax said Angle told her not to go out because she has a match next. Bliss said, “I did this for you.” She said she had a plan for all three of them to attack Asuka. She said it’d be Jax’s chance to redeem herself after her embarrassing loss last week. Bliss said she is her best friend and she was the one who was there for her last week when she fell to pieces because she loves her. Jax said, “I love you, too, Bliss.” They hugged. Bliss said it’s time for tough love. She said she needs her word that next week she’ll be in her corner when she faces Asuka. Jax said she will be. Bliss said, “Good, awesome!” She told her to go show the world the irresistible force is back and better than ever. [c]

(5) NIA JAX vs. JOAN KING

Short match, but the announcers had a chance to make a little fun of King.

WINNER: Jax in under 1:00.

-They went backstage to show Bliss and Mickie talking “privately,” not knowing they were filmed. Mickie said she cannot believe how she talked to Jax. Bliss said the truth hurts “and that was me being nice.” She said she could have been a lot harder. Mickie said she almost died when Bliss said “you see the people look at her when she walks through the airport.” Bliss said, “It’s like watching Shrek walk through TSA.” Jax watched and finally realized Bliss wasn’t a good friend. Bliss said Jax is happy carrying her bags and walking behind her. She said she needs to be coddled because she can’t handle the truth. She said she uses Nia because she’s a vulnerable human being. “Look at her, and look at me,” she said. Bliss said she can’t believe she screwed them tonight. Mickie said next week she better be there. Bliss said next week Nia will be out there because she has her in the palm of her hand. “She grew up her entire life a total loser and is so desperate and needy to have friends like us, she is easily manipulated and, if I’m being honest, she’s just as dumb as she is big.” She said she was gullible for buying it when she said she loves her. She said she worships the ground she walks on because she makes her relevant. Bliss said Jax will do all the dirty work and they’ll get all the glory. They complained about how long it took Charlie to arrive. Charlie told them that the boom mic was on the entire time so everyone has heard what they just said. (What about the camera?) Jax hung her head and walked to the back, barely holding herself together. She wiped a tear, took a deep breath, and then sprinted to the back. Some fans cheered. Bliss and Mickie tried to quickly pack, but then decided to just leave. Charlie turned to the camera and said next week it’ll be Bliss vs. Asuka. Jax barged in and began throwing her things around in a rage. Charlie said she’s not sure where they went.

(Keller’s Analysis: I’m glad they didn’t pretend that Bliss and Mickie would go all week not finding out that Jax just saw all of that. Another time, not long ago, that wouldn’t have seemed like a detail worth caring about. I do wish that Charlie would have pointed at the camera in the room, too, and said that was rolling also.) [c]

-A video package aired on the Matt Hardy-Bray Wyatt feud including Matt at the Hardy Compound introducing Maxel. (I believe Jeff Hardy was part of this originally, but had to be edited out due to his DWI arrest over the weekend.)

-Backstage, Bray said Hardy is a liar and fool and just a man. He said he made a very, very bad decision. He said he knows Matt can hear him. “When the Devil is standing on your doorstep, you should never let him in.” He said he will now gladly accept his invitation to the Ultimate Deletion. He said he has such a beautiful home and family. He said it’d be a real shame if something bad were to happen to them.

-Backstage, Angle said he knew Bray was crazy, “but what the hell happened to Matt?” Fans laughed. Angle turned to a referee who said Matt and Bray are both under his jurisdiction. He assigned the referee to the match. The ref asked if he did something wrong. Angle said he just wants to be sure he makes it back to Raw in one piece. The ref seemed terrified. [c]

-The announcers threw to a video recap of the opening segment with Roman Reigns and Vince McMahon.

-The announcers hyped Ultimate Deletion next week.

(6) TAG TEAM BATTLE ROYAL

Competitors: Titus & Apollo, Rhyno & Heath Slater, Dash & Dawson, Karl Anderson & Luke Gallows. Before the bell, Braun Strowman came out and he yelled for the bell to ring. Cesaro and Sheamus complained on commentary that Strowman isn’t even a team. Braun attacked everyone, but eventually they regrouped and tried together to eliminate him. Dash & Dawson eliminated Rhyno, drawing boos. Titus eliminated Dash and Dawson. Coach wondered if Strowman won, who is the “winning tag team.” Titus faced off with Braun one-on-one after the others were knocked to the floor. Coach said he liked Titus’s moxie and guts. Titus turned and went to the floor. They cut to a break as everyone regrouped. [c]

Back from the break, a swarm of tag wrestlers attacked Braun in the ring. He threw them all off of him. Anderson kicked his knee, then Gallows gave him a big boot to knock him to the floor. A cluster of wrestlers threw Braun into the ringside steps. Dash & Dawson attacked him with the ringside steps. Rhyno and Slater did it again. Then all four rammed him again and he crashed into the time keeper’s area. Cole asked Sheamus and Cesaro what they think of this. They said they just be perplexed. Braun eventually returned and began tossing various wrestlers over the top rope. He handed out some running powerslams, too. Braun finally eliminated Anderson, shouting first, “I’m going to WrestleMania!” Braun looked up at the WrestleMania sign. Cole fake-stuttered “B-b-b-b-but is Strowman going to WrestleMania?” Graves invited Cole to explain the rules to Braun. The Bar stood and looked petrified. Coach said Angle has some work to do between now and next Monday night. Grave said Braun was throwing human beings for distance, his favorite pastime. That was the end of the show.

WINNER: Braun 11:00.