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LUCHA UNDERGROUND TV REPORT – “Career Opportunities”
SEPTEMBER 6, 2017 (Season 3, Ep. 34)
TAPED IN LOS ANGELES, CALIF.
AIRED ON E REY NETWORK
REPORT BY JOEL DEHNEL, PWTORCH CONTRIBUTOR
-The show opened with recaps of the Cueto Cup, Worldwide Underground, Mundo-Mysterio, Matanza-Dario.
-Title Card
Announcers: Vampiro welcomed the audience to the show. Vampiro hyped the 100th episode for next week. Striker said there would be a big announcement from Dario regarding next week.
[JD’s Reax: I was thinking before this episode that they must be getting close to the 100th show. I didn’t realize it was that close.]
In ring: Santos introduced Drago followed by The Mack.
1 – Trios Tag Champion DRAGO w/Kobra Moon vs. THE MACK – For an Aztec Medallion
Drago hit a drop kick out o the gate followed by a DDT. Mack then got to his eet and flipped the bird at Drago. Mack came back with a flying kick followed by an upper cut. Drago got up and hit a kick then a DDT and a cradle. Mack hit a big boot then dropped Drago on his head. Moon taunted Mack which allowed Drago to capitalize and score the win.
WINNER: Drao at 3:44 to win an Aztec Medallion.
Post match: Mack hit a stunner on Drago. He attempted to stun Moon, but Pindar came out for the save. Vibora then hit Mack with a choke slam.
[Break]
In ring: Dario stood in the ring. He said next week will be the 100th episode of Lucha Underground. He said El Dragon Azteca Jr. Will face Pentagon Dark for an Aztec Medallion. Dario then said Mundo and Puma will captain a multi person match. It will be Mundo, Taya, Black and Mandel vs. Puma and who ever he chooses. Puma will have to come to the ring later tonight to announce his partners. Dario said the main event for next week will be Matanza vs. Rey Mysterio. Dario ordered Mysterio to the ring.
Mysterio came out right on cue. Dario calmed down Rey and asked him to listen closely. He said Matanza will take on the entire Rabbit Tribe as a warm up match. Dario ordered Rey to go home so he does not interfere in the match. Rey said he wasn’t going anywhere. Dario said either Rey leaves the ring now or he will fire El Dragon Azteca. Rey said he can leave, but he is going to end the Cueto family legacy next week then he’s coming after Dario.
[Break]
In ring: The ring was surrounded by police in riot gear and a police car. Santos introduced Joey Ryan followed by Cortez Castro.
2 – JOEY RYAN vs. CORTEZ CASTRO – Five-0 Street Fight or an Aztec Medallion.
They brawled back and forth until Ryan tried to escape the area by kept running into policemen. Castro caught Ryan wth a DDT then grabbed a wooden club fro under the ring. Ryan kicked down Castro then got a riot sheild from under the ring. He then found a pair of hand cuffs. He beat Castro over the head until he was busted open. Ryan then beat Castro with the wooden club. Ryan found a latex glove and some lube. He grabbed Castro’s butt then Castro whipped Ryan into the riot sheild. Castro hit a flurry of attacks then Ryan rolled to the outside. They then beat each other on the outside until Ryan threw Castro into several policemen. Castro bounced Ryan’s head on the hood of the police car then Ryan tossed Castro on top of the car. Ryan grabbed a sledge hammer rom under the ring, but Ryan issed his attacks. Ryan hit Castro with a Rock Bottom on the hood of the Police car. Ryan attempted the pin back in the ring. Ryan made a pile of the riot sheilds. Ryan rolled back to the outside. Castro grabbed a pot of coffee and poured it down Ryan’s trunks. Castro grabbed the taser and shocked Ryan’s crotch. Some how some way, Ryan immediately came back with a super kick. They both stood on the announce tableand Castro suplexed Ryan off the table. Castro sprayed Ryan with pepper spray then slammed him onto the riot shields for the win.
WINNER: Cortez Castro at 13:06 to win an Aztec Medallion. This is where there are holes in the tone of Lucha Underground. This match was treated as a complete joke because of how unrealistic it was. Boiling Coffee, a taser, pepper spray, nobody bought any of that stuff for a second because the selling lasted for only a breif moment. I think it very counter productive towards their agenda by having a joke hardcore match like this.
[Break]
In ring: Santos introduced the Rabbit Tribe followed by Matanza.
3 – MATANZA (w/Dario Cueto) vs. THE RABBIT TRIBE (PAUL LONDON & SALTADOR & MALA SUERTE)
The Tribe tried to do goofy stuff with Matanza. Matanza knocked them all into each other. Matanza fell to the outside then the Tribe took him down. Back in the ring, Matanza went back on the attack, but got caught in the corner. The Tribe worked togther to come back as they all hit drop kicks on Matanza. Matanza lifter London into the corner. Saltador and Suerte hit Matanza with Easter Eggs filled with confetti. Matanza cleared out Suerte and Saltador then hit a superplex from the second rope. He then hit Wrath of the Gods for the win.
WINNER: Matanza at 4:43. I guess I thought they would have just had Matanza look absolutely dominate in his return. I guess not.
[Break]
In ring: Puma stood in the middle of the ring. He said that next week he will be leading an atomicos team. He said he thought long and hard about his partners. Mundo came out and said nobody cares who his partners are because he’s going to be taken to slam town just like he did on the first episode of Lucha Underground. Puma said that might be true, but he took him to slam town to become the first LU champion. Mundo said he wanted to make their match more interesting. He suggested Puma put his mask on the line. Dario came out and said there was already a mask put on the line so he wanted something different. Dario suggested Puma put his career on the line instead. Puma then hit Mundo with a flying knee and accepted the stipulation.
FINAL THOUGHTS: They did a nice job getting you excited about the 100th episode next week. It should be a nice primer going to Ultima Lucha. Although it does raise some questions as to how they fill out the rest of the Ultima Lucha card.
NOW CHECK OUT LAST WEEK’S REPORT: 8/30 Lucha Underground TV Report: “Havoc Running Wild” – Son of Havoc vs. Son of Madness plus Mascarita Sagrada, Marty “The Moth” Martinez
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