MCNEILL Live-Tweets 9/26 WWE Raw – Inspector Clouseau, Wilson Pickett, Master Debaters & Those Adorable Cruiserweights

MCNEILL Live-Tweets 9/26 Raw – Inspector Clouseau, Wilson Pickett, Master Debaters & Those Adorable Cruiserweights

Please don’t send me any Presidential debate spoilers during Raw, unless one of the candidates is actually shaving the other’s head. Thank you.

There’s no better way to kick off Raw in Cincinnati than Roman Reigns’s entrance! (Plus, we blew the pyro budget last night.)

We invite you to discuss this Raw opening match via social media by using the hashtag #DebateAintStartedYet.

This Reigns-Rusev feud is so big, it has re-opened the bitter national rivalry between Bulgaria and American Samoa. (Said no one, ever.)

Corey Graves mentions that both wrestlers are deliberately working a low-impact style after last night’s match. Maybe Raw should be less meta.

You may interrupt Raw tweets to inform me if one candidate is giving the other candidate CPR. (Hypothetically.)

I will also allow interruption of the Raw tweets if one candidate’s overly coiffed hair catches fire. (Hypothetically.)

Is there any chance of getting Jim Ross back on Raw long enough so he can tell us what a hoss Rusev is? (And how he outkicked his coverage.)

We’re tracking the situation here in Cincinnati, and we’ll break in once Reigns & Rusev stop fighting and begin their verbal debate.

Cole: This rivalry between Reigns and Rusev seems far from over.

Saxton: Didn’t I just say that five seconds ago?

Corey: TL; DR.

Now that we’ve seen our main event match, let’s talk about something we’re actually excited about: the upcoming release of WWE2K17!

Coming up next, Mick Foley and his beard are heading to the ring to address some controversy. Debate? What debate?

If Russo were booking tonight, Gallows & Anderson would be coming to the ring as “The Master Debaters.”

Love Cesaro, but the only character who should have a European police siren in his entrance music is Inspector Jacques Clouseau.

Sheamus-Cesaro promo war. I will Paypal Mick Foley $20 right now if he calls to the back for a translator.

Mick Foley just made Sheamus & Cesaro unlikely tag team partners who hate each other. Maybe Vince Russo IS booking tonight.

Coming up next, The New Day vs. Gallows/Anderson in a re-match for the Raw Tag Team Titles!

Remember, there’s nothing coming up on Raw tonight which was worth mentioning in the hope (presidential debate) viewers would stay tuned. Nice work, you people.

“Demolition held the WWE World Tag Team Titles for 478 days.” True. Now ask Cole to explain why they’re not in the WWE Hall of Fame.

Rumor has it the debate will get underway as soon as Lester Holt finishes checking the candidates for foreign objects.

Last night after Clash of Champions, Triple H swung by to pick up his wife from work. In Indiana.

Moments ago, we learned there’s not one angle of Chad Patton’s ref bump from last night that keeps it from looking lame.

Did You Know? WWE has more Instagram followers than the NFL. Which would be relevant if any of them were watching Raw.

If you know who Mick Foley’s parodying in that last promo, go ahead and DM Bruce Mitchell. He’ll let us in on it eventually.

Bayley picks up a big Raw victory over Anna Faris.

Backstage, Stephanie McMahon dresses down Mick Foley. (Not literally. Thank God.)

“We’re about to see the best in the world under 205 pounds…” Asuka’s in the building? Awesome.

Rich Swann/Cedric Alexander vs. Drew Gulak/Lince Dorado. WWE has the two African-Americans teaming together. I’m shocked.

Still waiting for Cole to introduce the smaller wrestlers as “those adorable cruiserweights.”

That was good. I’ll keep hoping for a Kid Romeo Cruiserweight Tag Team Classic Tournament at Full Sail. It could happen.

Cesaro & Sheamus are fighting actual enhancement guys. I just figured, y’know, the Shining Stars.

(Willis) Williams gets Cesaro in an armbar and goes to tag in (Nick) Cutler. Cutler, amazingly, does not say “What’chu talkin’ ’bout, Willis?” Cole takes care of that.

Tonight, the Raw debut of WWE Cruiserweight champion T.J. Perkins. And I just noticed that Big Cass hasn’t wrestled yet tonight.

Still to come, Charlotte celebrates her victory, and Chris Jericho welcomes Kevin Owens to the “Highlight Reel.” Well, I’m sold…

Sasha Banks calls out Charlotte for next week, and beats up Charlotte & Dana Brooke. But she does not tell Charlotte “You’re wrong!”

Waiting for Lester Holt to suggest that Hillary & Donald form a tag team to go after China. Let me know when that happens.

TJP vs. Tony Nese. Perkins vs. Kendrick announced for next week. They completely gave up at the start of the second hour, didn’t they?

Your hot new cruiserweight champion, T.J. Perkins, takes on a gifted athlete in Tony Nese. The crowd, of course, chants for C.M. Punk.

In honor of Hispanic Heritage Month, WWE presents an exclusive profile of Jose Luis Rivera.

Charlotte vs. Sasha next week on Raw. But I’m sure the fans in Cincinnati are thrilled with this main event they’re getting.

BREAKING NEWS: Kelso and Hyde are coming to Raw next week. No, really.

Jericho calls KO the longest reigning WWE Universal Champion of all time. Funny AND accurate.

“You know what they say about Karma.” Yeah. Kharma was a badass. What’s your point, Cole?

Seth Rollins is here, but he isn’t cleared to fight. However, Enzo & Cass are, and they want to fight Owens & Jericho. Debate over-run!

Your main event is Enzo/Cass vs. Owens/Jericho, and it’s NEXT! Good thing the debate didn’t run long, huh?

Cole is calling this match like he has money riding on the Atlanta Falcons.

Fun match, ending with the Champ pinning Enzo clean with a powerbomb. And that’s your show. Don’t miss “Table For 3!”