WWE Legends House Review
Season 1, Episode 1
Aired April 17, 2014 on WWE Network
Report by James Caldwell, PWTorch assistant editor

The Cast: Roddy Piper, Tony Atlas, "Mean" Gene Okerlund, Pat Patterson, Hillbilly Jim, The Fink, "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan, Jimmy Hart, and a female compadre, Ashley.

The Location: A huge house in the Southern California area.

Atlas was the first man spotlighted, then ol' Hillbilly Jim. Next was Pat Patterson, who took credit for creating the Royal Rumble. Jimmy Hart was fourth to round out the first-half of the cast.

Howard Finkel was introduced fifth and he reminisced with Hart about bringing him to WWF. "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan showed up sixth and said he might clash with Tony Atlas in the house. Duggan found out that he's rooming with Roddy Piper, who was introduced eighth after "Mean" Gene Okerlund was introduced seventh.

Everyone stopped for Piper's introduction, curious about how he would fit in with the house. Atlas was the first to greet him and Piper noted he's the outcast of the bunch. Piper, sounding pretty rough, surveyed his quarters and said he fears their brotherhood will be tested in the house.

WWE cut to a female cast member, Ashley, entering the Legends House, wowing the Legends. Ashley said she's been asked to arrange various events for the Legends while living here in Palm Springs. Gene perked up, while Hart said Ashley's presence was an annoyance.

The crew then wandered around the neighborhood trying to introduce themselves and present a fresh pastry. Piper and Duggan found a family, who had a kid who wanted to see Piper wrestle. So, Piper cheap-shotted Duggan from behind. Piper ended up eating dog food before Duggan booted him out of the house.

Back at the Legends House, the Legends reflected on their neighborhood trip. Duggan continued to take friendly jabs at Piper in the process. The next morning, Piper and Duggan joked about Piper unable to work the blender. Piper vs. The Blender went on for a few minutes.

On to dinner, where Patterson proposed a dinner option. But, first, a round of golf. Then, Patterson and Jimmy Hart went to the grocery store to shop for dinner items. While Patterson cooked, Hart & Hillbilly faced Fink & Piper in a game of tennis. Piper couldn't hit the ball and Fink was too out-of-shape to reach the ball.

Dinner wasn't ready, so Piper contemplated facing The Blender again while they waited for Patterson to finish cooking. The next morning, they found actor Gary Busey banging a gong outside on the lawn. Patterson noted he had no idea who Busey is. The Legends then sat down on mats as Busey led them in meditation to remove negativity. Piper's response to being told to close his eyes: "F--- you."

Busey finished the session, then the Legends sat down for lunch as Tony Atlas reflected on Busey being all over the map. Patterson called it "gaga" about being positive all the time, not buying Busey's deep thoughts. Atlas and Duggan then got into a disagreement about the family dynamic. Busey called for a time-out, then asked if they have problems with Anger Management.

This led to a discussion of some wrestlers living out their character after pro wrestling. Piper spoke up that the movie doesn't end after the wrestling show, as he's Roddy Piper to everyone. Busey called it a real trap, then noted he's glad he doesn't have to be in that situation. Piper just wiped his head out of frustration.

Next was a reflection on WrestleMania 1. Everyone gave Piper a good-natured ribbing about not knowing which Piper they were going to deal with at the time. The Legends then talked about their injuries and demons faced during their careers. Hillbilly called the group of wrestlers in the House a bunch of survivors.

Off to Mean Gene at the bar. Gene poured drinks for the cast, then WWE showed Piper lying in his bed unable to take a nap. Piper reflected on idle hands and time not being good for him. Piper said he quit drinking in September 2009, but being at the House put him back in that mentality. Piper wandered off to the weight room and said this is bad. Piper slipped out the back door and wandered around looking for a way out. He ended up walking down the street trying to find a peaceful spot. Jimmy Hart said he thinks this could lead to a major blow-up. Piper was shown howling at a full moon to close the first episode.

OVERALL THOUGHTS: You can tell why the show was not picked up by a TV network and kept on-file for a few years before the Network launched. It's just an odd show that does not present the Legends in a very dignified light. And, there is not a strong heroic figure in the mix to draw people in. Piper is the troubled outcast, Duggan speaks his mind too much, Patterson is the reserved Doubting Thomas, Tony Atlas has feelings ready to be shared, Jimmy Hart is Jimmy Hart, Hillbilly is a reasonable chap, "Mean" Gene is an outspoken horndog, Fink is a quiet background player, and a random female host/assistant/stunt-creator was thrown in the mix.

The characters will assuredly be fleshed out over time, but it's just an odd-feeling show. Mix in the fact that the show is centered on Piper, who is in a state where you're not sure if he's putting on an act or really having health problems, and it's an uncomfortable watch. Appropriately enough, "uncomfortable" is the word Piper used to describe the show in an interview this week after watching the first episode.

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