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MITCHELL'S TAKE
MOJO MITCHELL'S Superstar Stream of Three Separate announcing Teams For One Hour Sets Some Kind Of TV Record Apr 16, 2009 - 9:01:44 PM
Wow. Wrestling is back on WGN. Where's Jack Brickhouse?
The closest thing there is to Brickhouse these days, Jim Ross, is hosting, alongside Todd Grisham. I guess that means there's no new talent out there that meets the high standards of sports entertainment announcing, seeing how WWE actually advertisied to fill the announcing job here.
Grisham and Ross claim with straight faces that this is the only place to see WWE Superstars from all three brands. "It's like a WWE All Star game!" Ross burbles.
The audio mix isn't quite right, with the announcers buried under the crowd. The fans are impressively hot for the first match
The very first commercial on the historic premiere edition of WWE Superstars on WGN is for the DVD release of "The Wrestler" Tuesday, which is appropriate seeing how WWE subverted the message of the movie and has now made just another of their commodities.
Undertaker faces Matt Hardy in the very first match on the historic premiere edition of WWE Superstars on WGN. Undertaker on the first show, of course, sends the message that this isn't just another one of those WWE "D" shows like Heat, Velocity, and the rest. The ratings will tell the tale as to whether the likes of the Dead Man will be on Superstars a month from now.
Matt Hardy isn't exactly the type of heel Undertaker usually works with (although he is the size of Shawn Michaels), but both guys work hard to make this a good TV match. Matt Hardy just walks off for the countout loss. "What a coward!" Ross yells to make up for the bad finish.
Jeff Hardy also isn't satisfied with the finish. He jumps brother Matt on the ramp and throws him back in the ring. Dumb ol' Matt stares down his brother, forgetting that Undertaker is still in the ring, ready to give him a chokeslam.
That makes up for the countout finish, right?
Oh, now Josh Matthews and Matt Striker are announcing the ECW semi-finals between Finlay and Whatever Happened to Christian. I get it now. WWE Superstars is like a tri-branded sampler platter!
Finlay (w/ Hornswoggle) faces Christian. See, this won't be a meaningless after-thought show, these matches will have consequences! The winner here gets Jack Swagger for the ECW Title at Backlash. Good thing Swagger has paid at least enough dues to be on Backlash or we might be seeing the finals right here for free on WGN.
Christian wins a perfectly competent match and Matt Striker sells the hell out of it. An ECW Title match, that's gotta be worth leaving TNA for, right?
Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler announce Shane McMahon versus Cody Rhodes. Eve Torres interviews Shane McMahon, who reads his lines not at all robotically.
I always like how Michael Cole says "deeply personal" with the same emotion he says everything else.
The Son of The Plumber faces The Son of Caesar. Shane steals Undertaker's triangle choke. He also demonstrates an armbar. Everybody's pals have been banned from ringside, you know, like at WrestleMania.
Shane McMahon blows up like a balloon after the break, even though he's spending a lot of time lying on his back.
Cody Rhodes gets a chair, but the ref won't let him use it. Shane sneakily gets it, but not sneakily enough that when he hits Rhodes in the ribs the ref doesn't DQ him.
Shane gets Cody and the chair ready to go Coast to Coast. The camera angles do their best to hide it, but it sure looks like old Shane landed on his ass before he kicked the trashcan into Rhodes.
This was a good hour of Superstar wrestling. A month or two down the road will tell the tale about this show, though.
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