MCNEILL'S TAKE
McNEILL: What If WWE Actually Had A Random Draft?
Jun 20, 2008 - 5:42:11 PM |
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By Pat McNeill, Torch Columnist
The 2008 WWE Draft: Originally, I was planning to use this space in order to predict the outcome of the 2008 WWE Draft. That idea soon fell by the wayside. WWE is not going to reveal any of its plans for the draft, or even the format they're using. So, this column is going to go in a very different direction.
We have a list of all the 104 superstars on all three brands, taken directly from WWE.com. That, combined with a summary of last year's draft show and a random number generator, will enable us to simulate what would happen if WWE gave us an actual random draft under last year's format. Last year, there were ten draft picks on television. For our purposes here, we'll do ten draft picks, and then figure out how to correct any obvious imbalances left over after we finish. Are you all with us? Let's go.
Pick #1: ECW picks someone from Smackdown. The generator stops spinning, and we kick off the draft with Teddy Long getting Vickie Guerrero, the Smackdown General Manager! La Familia is obviously upset and, for the moment, Smackdown has no leadership.
Pick #2: Smackdown selects someone from Raw. Believe it or not, Smackdown picks up a former Intercontinental Champion, in the form of Santino Marella. Santino may not like being moved from the flagship show, but he's a man who can tap that broad international audience WWE is looking to reach with its Friday night network show.
Pick #3: Raw selects someone from Smackdown. Who's going to the pay window? Raw's first draft acquisition is Maryse Ouellet, the French-Canadian bombshell. With Deuce And Domino bickering, it probably is time for a chance. Plus, putting her on Raw reunites her with Ted DiBiase Jr., who Maryse managed in Florida Championship Wrestling.
Pick #4: Smackdown selects someone from Raw. In a major surprise, Friday Night Smackdown ends up with Playboy cover girl, reality TV washout and alleged escort Ashley Massaro. The Smackdown wrestlers will at least have the good grace to pretend they're thrilled with the acquisition.
Pick #5: Raw selects someone from ECW. Don't get all excited just yet, as the fine art of the random draw gives us former cruiserweight champion Nunzio Maritato making the transition to the main show. The first thing Brian Gewirtz will do is see whether Nunzio can deliver the same lines that were going to Santino.
Pick #6: Smackdown selects someone from Raw. Finally, the luck of the draw is good to the Friday night gang, as the random number generator stops at multi-time WWE champion "The Heartbreak Kid" Shawn Michaels. It's time to reschedule Bible study day in San Antonio. Michaels would mean a lot to the Friday show, including semi-fresh feuds with Edge, Batista, M.V.P. and eventually The Undertaker.
Pick #7: Raw selects someone from Smackdown. The big wheel stops at a wrestler who is currently on the disabled list, former World Champion Rey Mysterio. Sure, he won't be ready for a couple of months, but Mysterio could have fresh feuds and matchups with Triple H, Randy Orton, Chris Jericho and Umaga. That's a heck of a deal.
Pick #8: Smackdown selects someone from Raw. There's no cruiserweight division in WWE anymore, but Smackdown gets one of the more exciting smaller wrestlers in North America when they receive Brian Kendrick through the luck of the draw. Plus, it's not like London and Kendrick are being utilized on Raw.
Pick #9: ECW picks someone from Smackdown. This is a big moment for the Tuesday night crew, as they wind up with exciting high-flyer Kenny Dykstra. Kenny's already in the doghouse with WWE for reasons unknown, but he actually get an opportunity to shine as part of a smaller roster.
Pick #10: Raw selects someone from ECW. There's not much depth on the Extreme team, which is why it shouldn't be any surprise that the hopper stopped on Armando Alejandro Estrada. Actually, Estrada's very versatile, and it's almost a shame to waste him on Sci-Fi. He'd made a fine toady for Mr. McMahon, or a manager/partner for his old friend Umaga.
And there's your Draft Night! Let's close things out with a trade. In WWE storylines, I can't imagine Teddy Long wanting Vickie Guerrero on ECW with him, so let's have Smackdown champ Edge temporarily take charge and trade Vickie back to Smackdown in exchange for Diva Search winner Eve Torres. Teddy's a player, and he'd take that deal in a heartbeat.
What have we proved? Well, even a smaller draft with wrestlers moving at random could immediately improve the WWE product, and give us some new feuds and matchups. There's no telling what will actually happen on Monday, but the WWE Draft should give us a strong indication what's ahead for the next six months of WWE storylines.
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