Time for our weekly look at the sturm and drang of the pro wrestling business as we wonder why we didn't deserve to see the end of last night's Raw main event.
WHO'S HOT?
Ken Kennedy: WWE does have a plan to freshen up its Raw program. Amazingly, that plan is for a feud between Mr. Kennedy and newly crowned King of the Ring William Regal. Regal is a good opponent for a young wrestler looking to move up the ladder, and the snarky Kennedy will be given every opportunity to succeed.
Mick Foley: Mick Foley had huge shoes to fill as WWE color commentator for Smackdown. No, I mean it. Coachman has big feet. Foley was a natural on his first night at the broadcast table. Michael Cole seemed happy to have him, and I'm pretty sure Jonathan Coachman can move on to doing something he enjoys more than announcing wrestling.
Samoa Joe & Kurt Angle: You remember TNA's little creative problem, where the Knockouts always had the highest rated match on Impact and it made the bookers look silly? TNA solved that problem this week by not booking a knockouts match. Brilliant! Having said that, Joe and Angle put on the best match to air on Spike TV in many, many months, right up until that stupid finish. Then, WWE did their own version of that stupid finish last night. But that's another story.
MsChif: Green haired lady, lovely lady. In the space of one weekend, MsChif won the Shimmer title from Sara Del Rey in Illinois, then turned around and captured the NWA Women's Title for a second time from Amazing Kong in Missouri. How long before WWE or TNA takes notice of one of the most talented female wrestlers in North America?
WHO'S NOT?
Michael Hayes: Suspended by World Wrestling Entertainment for his latest round of "joking" racist remarks directed at Mark Henry. One of our local radio shows used to parody Ted Turner by putting the Confederate song "Dixie" behind all of Turner's sound bites. Well, if the former Freebird loses his job and gets hired by TNA, imagine the great fun Vince Russo could have with P.S. as a racist heel authority figure. Then they could hire Konnan back to feud with Hayes. This one writes itself.
Hulk Hogan: What's creepier than Hulk Hogan dating a young woman who's a dead ringer for his 19-year-old daughter? Now we know. It's the sight of Hulk Hogan rubbing sunscreen all over his 19-year-old daughter's groin and buttocks while at poolside. Good grief, Hulk. Where were the "Hogan Knows Best" cameras while this was going down?
Karen Angle: Do we really need to hear about Kurt Angle's sex life on satellite radio? Gosh, I hope not. I can tell you that if Kurt Angle is legitimately too banged up to have a physical relationship with his wife, it's time to get a new team of doctors.
Travis Tomko: Tomko was forced to give up his spot as part of the TNA Tag Team titles for skipping the Lockdown fanfest to wrestle in Japan. No, seriously. They expected Tomko to skip an actual Japan show in order sign autographs. Tomko is also in the doghouse for thinking that working at the Tokyo Dome trumps working at the Impact Zone. Maybe it does, but you shouldn't say that sort of thing out loud.
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