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KELLER'S TNA IMPACT REPORT 11/26: Full quotes from Hulk Hogan on joining TNA, Dixie press conference hype, one-night title tournament
Dec 1, 2009 - 12:54:26 PM |
By Wade Keller, PWTorch editor
KELLER'S TNA IMPACT REPORT
NOVEMBER 26, 2009
TAPED IN ORLANDO, FLA.
AIRED ON SPIKE TV
[Q1]
-A video package aired with various people reacting to Hulk Hogan joining TNA, focused primarily on Mick Foley, Kevin Nash, and A.J. Styles. It closed with Hogan saying, "This is going to be one heck of a wild ride." The TNA Impact opening then aired.
-Mike Tenay introduced the show and hyped the opening round of the "TNA Championship Series" (TCS). They went to Tenay and Taz at ringside wishing viewers a Happy Thanksgiving. The brackets are Kurt Angle vs. Pope, Homicide vs. Robert Roode, Abyss vs. Bobby Lashley, Desmond Wolfe vs. Suicide.
1 -- "THE BOSS" BOBBY LASHLEY(w/Crystal) vs. ABYSS
Lashley avoided an early corner splash attempt by Abyss. Abyss soon took control, though, choking Lashley on the middle rope. Taz said anyone with an amateur wrestling background has an advantage in a tournament setting. "You want to win and move on," he said. Lashley came back with a clothesline and a spinebuster. He clotheslined Abyss over the top rope to the floor. When he dropped to the floor, he inadvertently elbowed Crystal as she came at him from behind. She grabbed at her ankle. Abyss was worried about what he did, and that distraction led him vulnerable to a spear from Lashley followed by a dragon sleeper for the win.
WINNER: Lashley in 4:00.
STAR RATING: 1/2* -- Not much to it. Still too many clotheslines by Abyss. It plays right into a stereotype about him and wrestlers who look like him (i.e. massively muscular). [c]
-TNA ran an ad pushing up to 80 percent savings and free shipping on Black Friday on TNA merchandise at their website.
[Q2]
-Jeremy Borash approached Mick Foley backstage. Borash tried to talk Foley into being positive about Hogan coming to TNA since they both want to make TNA number one. Foley asked why it was done in such a clandestine manner. Borash cited a bunch of radio shows and the press conference to disprove Foley's assertion. Foley complained that Bubba the Love Sponge and his listeners were informed before he was. Borash said everyone got a memo. Foley said he's the executive shareholder and he should have been better informed. He said the whole thing stinks. He quoted Nash saying that Hogan isn't coming in alone. Foley said if anyone knows about back-stabbing and the unseemly side of the business, it's Angle, and he's going to talk to him.
2 -- SUICIDE vs. DESMOND WOLFE
Wolfe controlled the opening two minutes as Taz and Tenay hyped Dixie Carter's Twitter page. Suicide came back at 3:00 with some offense. Wolfe came back and went for a Tower of London, but Suicide blocked it and hit a dropkick. Wolfe came back seconds later with the Tower of London for the win.
WINNER: Wolfe in 5:00.
STAR RATING: 3/4* -- Okay, but still pretty short for a match between supposedly even wrestlers. If Suicide is portrayed as an X Title contender, but he loses clean to Wolfe in five minutes on TV and it's not considered a big deal, that dooms the entire X Division to seeming second-rate compared to the heavyweights. [c]
3 -- KURT ANGLE vs. POPE D'ANGELO
Taz compared a Pope shoulder-tackle to the Road Warriors at 1:00 for a two count. Angle came right back with an overhead released suplex. At 3:00 Pope went on a flurry and played to the crowd. He had Angle down in the corner and hit a swinging drop elbow. Angle countered with an anklelock seconds later. Pope kicked out, but Angle then executed an Angle slam for the win. They shook hands and hugged afterward. Tenay called it Angle's "seal of approval."
WINNER: Angle in 5:00.
STAR RATING: *1/2 -- Nice page start to finish.
[Q3] [c]
-Mid-break they showed Homicide telling a backstage worker he wanted extra pyro tonight. The worker said that's not his call. Homicide insisted and harassed him.
-Foley walked up to Angle backstage and asked where Scotty, Booker, and Stinger was. Angle said Sting hasn't been around in months and "the Mafia is no more." He asked where he's been. Foley said Dixie Carter tells Angle everything, so he wanted to know what she's told him. Angle said Foley needs to embrace Hogan because he's coming in to take the company to new heights. Angle said he's on board. Foley said he hopes whomever Hogan brings with him is also on board. Foley cited Nash's prediction. Angle told Foley not to listen to Nash.
4 -- HOMICIDE vs. ROBERT ROODE
They brawled at ringside early, which Taz called "the world of Homicide." In the ring Homcide settled into a nerve hold. Roode hit a sudden spinebuster for the clean win.
WINNER: Roode in 4:00.
STAR RATING: 3/4*
-The first round set up Lashley vs. Wolfe and Angle vs. Roode in the semi-finals of the TCS.
-Homicide threw a fit at ringside afterward, throwing a chair around and yelling at the announcers. [c]
[Q4]
-Borash called the TCS the "TNA Holiday Classic," which would be THC. He interviewed Angle backstage regarding facing Robert Roode. Angle said Roode changed his opinion about the TNA locker room, but he's got his eye on the prize. He said never expected anything to be handed to him, so he's going to win two more matches. He said a small part of him hopes Wolfe makes it to the finals because he'd love to beat him to earn a title shot.
5 -- KNOCKOUTS BATTLE ROYAL
The BP's graphic says, "Cleansing the world of one ugly person at a time." A graphic under their name said, "They think 'Plymouth Rock' s a new car." That wasn't as funny as someone hoped. If you wondered if for a Thanksgiving show when family might be gathered watching if they'd cut out all of the edge or risque content, they did the close-ups of the crotches and asses of the Beautiful People as they entered the ring. ODB was introduced as the special enforcer referee at ringside. Tenay questioned whether she could be objective. The ten participants were Lacey Von Erich, Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne, Alicia Flash, Traci Brooks, Tara, Sarita, Taylor Wilde, Daffney, and Hamada. The first eliminated was Daffney in the opening seconds. Taylor and Sarita eliminated Alicia Flash and Traci. [c] Mid-commercial they showed Tara eliminating Lacey. [c] BP eliminated Sarita at 5:00. It came down to Tara vs. Love and Rayne. Tara knocked Love off the ring apron to eliminate her and a minute later eliminated Rayne to win. OBD raised Tara's arm, but slapped away a handshake offer by Tara.
WINNER: Tara in 6:00.
-Borash interviewed Nash and Eric Young backstage. Nash asked Borash if he had a "big-man fetish" and said he creeps him out. He told him to direct his questions to Young. Young said it's ironic that TNA wrestlers are mauling each other on Thanksgiving. He said greed is truly an American tradition, also. He said his Global Title will never be defended on American soil or against an American wrestler. He closed with, "Welcome to our world."
[Q5]
-They went to a video package on Hulk Hogan saying he's been in a wrestling war before and he's proven that the fans will go where Hogan goes, and the talent isn't far behind. He told the fans that the future of WWE vs. TNA is in their hands and it's going to be a wild ride.
-Scott Steiner complained to Mick Foley backstage, calling him "Mitch." He wanted the seamstress to make him new Main Event Mafia outfits. Foley said he alluded to it being over. Steiner said if he didn't outright say it's over, then it's not. Foley asked what he knows about Hogan. Steiner said he didn't date him, but they were in the NWO together and there was honor among thieves. Steiner asked who the smartest guy he knows is. Foley said something, but it was bleeped. He said, "He came up with the Ron Simmons 'what' gimmick." Wasn't it a "Damn!" gimmick? Steiner asked, "What?" Foley was bleeped again. Whatever. Foley asked Steiner who Hogan might bring with him. Steiner said he can't see into the future. He asked who said he's bringing with him. Foley said Nash. Steiner said if Nash said it, then it's true. The seamstress asked Steiner if he wanted two F's in Maffia, noting there's only one. He told her to put the extra F where the son don't shine. [c]
-Foley approached Nash and Young backstage. Foley said he looked into the two week suspension thing and he's making more money than he realized. He said he doesn't have the money Nash wants because his money is tied up in TNA, school for his kids, and an education center for kids in Africa. Foley said he gets that money is important to him, but his job is to find out what's going on with Dixie and Hogan. He said Dixie won't return his calls. Nash said, "Okay, I'll give you one name. Virgil." He said he was just kidding. Then he said, "I'm almost positive it's The Disciple." He said he was kidding again. Foley said it'd make sense if it was Scott Hall. Nash said he hadn't thought of that, but then he decided to shove his armpit in Foley's face and make a strange sound for some reason. Foley said he needs to know what's going on. Nash then said, "Well, between you and me, if (Brian) Nobbs comes in, I'm quitting." Nash said in all seriousness, when Hogan tells him anything, he'll "dump it in his lap." When Foley walked away, Young said that was pathetic. Nash agreed.
-Tenay said Foley is obsessed with Hogan, but then pressed Taz if he had heard anything. Taz said he naturally didn't have a flair of an idea. Not really. He just said he had no info.
6 -- BOBBY LASHLEY (w/Crystal) vs. DESMOND WOLFE - TCS Semi-Finals
Taz said this TNA Championship Series should not be confused with the Team Challenge Series. Tenay asked Taz what the best PPV match of 2009 was. Taz said it was easily Angle vs. Wolfe. Tenay asked, "What about A.J. Styles, Samoa Joe, and Daniels?" Taz said it was good, but not as good. Tenay said they were totally different kinds of matches. He plugged voting at TNA's website. Wolfe totally controlled Lashley in the opening couple minutes with methodical mid-ring chain holds.
[Q6]
Lashley avoided a corner charge and then speared him and gave him a gut-buster type move. He followed with a full-nelson slam for a two count at 3:00. When Wolfe went for at Tower of London, Lashley blocked it. Wolfe stayed in control, dropping Lashley over a rope throat-first. Wolfe then applied a nasty looking arm torque in the ropes. The ref DQ'd Wolfe for not breaking before five. Wolfe yelled he would do that to Angle, but the DQ cost him a potential chance against him in the finals. Wolfe bled from his bottom lip.
WINNER: Lashley in 5:00.
STAR RATING: * -- This finish wasn't bad in terms of seeming they rushed to a finish between two main eventers. Instead, the DQ from Wolfe's intensity and focus on Angle explained the match going only five minutes. [c]
-Lauren interviewed Lashley and his wife backstage. Crystal said whether it's TNA or MMA, nobody stops Bobby. He said Bobby will win the tournament, then the title, and then dictate his own future.
7 -- KURT ANGLE vs. ROBERT ROODE -- TCS Semi-Finals
Tenay said Roode is usually a tag wrestler, but this TCS format is giving Roode a rare opportunity to earn a singles title shot. Taz said Roode might be looking to tag his partner only to realize he doesn't have one to relieve him. At 3:00 Angle scored a couple near falls. Roode made a comeback and by 5:00 was scoring near falls himself including one after a spinebuster. With Angle back in control at 7:00, Wolfe walked out and trash-talked toward Angle, then spit on him. Angle jumped to ringside and went after Wolfe, leading to Angle being counted out. The ref was a hard-ass about it as Angle slide into the ring right around his tenth count.
WINNER: Roode in 8:00.
STAR RATING: *3/4 -- This had time to tell more of a story than the 3-5 minute matches in the first around.
[Q7] [c]
-A.J. Styles walked out with the TNA World Title over his shoulder. He said he came out to say something, but first he wanted to say: "Stinger, I haven't heard from you in a while. It's Thanksgiving. I'm a concerned friend, so do me a favor. Give me a call." Daniels then interrupted. He walked into the ring and said Sting has finally realized it costs him more to be his friend than it's worth. Daniels said he was a better friend to Styles than Styles was to him. He asked him where his friendship ever got him. He said he didn't get any World Title shots in TNA. He said when he lost his job in TNA and was gone for 16 months, he didn't hear from Styles. Daniels said Styles has stroke in TNA and he didn't use that to get him his job back. Daniels stopped Styles from defending himself and said, "Now I'm back." He said when he finally got his opportunity at the title at Turning Point, Styles stabbed him in the back and stole his only chance for greatness by breaking up his pin on Joe. Daniels said he did it because he knew he was always a better wrestler than him. He said they are enemies now and he won't let his friendship be an anchor around his ankle. Daniels told Styles to apologize to his wife and kids for what he brought on to their daddy. Styles said he won't tell them anything because they'll find out what Uncle Chris was all about when they grow up. He said at Final Resolution, he'll find out what he's all about. Taz said Daniels lit a flame under Styles. [c]
[Q8]
-Another vignette narrated by Hulk Hogan aired, touting changes in TNA that will "rock the house, brother."
-Lauren interviewed Roode backstage regarding facing Lashley next. He said he's going out there not just for himself, but also for his partner. He said after he beats Lashley, it'll give Beer Money a chance to take back their TNA World Tag Team Titles. He closed with, "You will find out in a moment that it pays to be Roode."
-A video package aired on the signing of Hulk Hogan. It hyped that next week Dixie Carter will address "the State of TNA Wrestling."
8 -- ROBERT ROODE vs. BOBBY LASHLEY (w/Crystal)
Tenay explained that this tournament is to get a title shot in the division you normally compete in, so if Lashley wins, he gets a World Title shot, whereas if Roode wins, he gets a tag team title shot. Lashley went for a dragon sleeper in the opening minute, but Roode reached the bottom rope. At 2:00 they cut to a break with just eight minutes left in the show. [c] They showed a clip from during the break of Roode working over Lashley's arm. They showed a concerned Crystal at ringside. Babyfaces shouldn't have their wives at ringside. It just comes across as a meddling spouse overreacting to her husband doing his job and, on occasion, getting in the way. Tenay plugged Dixie Carter's Twitter page and then hyped the press conference with her next week. Lashley made a comeback at 9:00 and hit a couple power moves for a two count. Roode came back with a near fall of his own with a fisherman suplex seconds later. Roode went for a neckbreaker off the ropes, but Lashley moved and then hit a spear for the win. Crystal ran into the ring to celebrate with her husband.
WINNER: Lashley in 11:00.
STAR RATING: *3/4 -- About what you expect with Lashley. He's pretty stiff in his movements and limited in the bumps he'll take since his MMA career takes priority. It was a serviceable match. Lashley still lacks charisma, and his wife being around helps and hurts at the same time.
QUOTEBOOK
Mike Tenay on Raven and Dr. Stevie: "They choked the life out of Abyss."
Taz: "Well, they didn't choke the life out of him because otherwise he wouldn't be here on Turkey day. I'm just saying."
Taz to Mike Tenay during The Beautiful People's ring entrance: "I bet you wish you were the second rope, you psycho pervert."
Tenay in response: "That's the nicest thing you've ever said about me. Happy Thanksgiving."
Taz: "You can see Lacey's ugly stick is very erect."
Hulk Hogan: "When you pick a fight, you've got to pick a good one. I've proved that not only will the fans go where Hulk Hogan goes, I've proved the talent in this wrestling business isn't far behind. The future between WWE and TNA is in your hands. I guarantee you as we get momentum, as we move forward, as it gets more intense every week, you'll see TNA - the little company that could that's been around for just a few years on Spike TV - start to move in leaps and bounds. In a short amount of time, with the power of Hulkamania, TNA, Dixie Carter, and all the talent that's in that company is gonna prove we are the number one business today in sports entertainment. That's your future, and it's in your hands, Hulkamaniacs. This is going to be one heck of a wild ride!"
Daniels to A.J. Styles: "You always wanted me to be your best friend because you didn't want me to be your worst enemy."
Hulk Hogan: "So many of the TNA fans and the Hulkamaniacs fans say, 'I'm so tired of this business. It's boring. It's not like it used to be. We want to see it get back on track, the fast-pace, the excitement, the drama.' Well, you know something, we're going to change that because now all of the Hulkamaniacs and TNA fans have bonded as one. They're TNA Hulkamaniacs. And this is the time. Instead of the same old thing, one choice, we're going to give you a choice, believe me. Not only for the fans, but for the talent. We're going to flip this business upside down. I guarantee you it's not going to be boring anymore because Hulk Hogan has a bunch of surprises for all the TNA fans, all the Hulkamaniacs, now that we're all as one, let's get ready to rock the house, brothers."
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