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KELLER'S WWE RAW REPORT
JUNE 29, 2009
AIRED ON USA NETWORK

BOX SCORE BASICS

-Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler introduced the show.

-Vince McMahon walked out onto the stage. He said if Donald Trump were here, he would surely go commercial-free and refund everyone's tickets. He said he can't go commercial free, but he can refund their ticket money. The crowd cheered. He then said, "Yes, that I can do, but I won't do." The crowd booed. He said Trump instituted a 15 Superstar trade between Raw, Smackdown, and ECW that he has to live with. Without giving any more details, he said Trump also negotiated that there will be a weekly guest host with the same power as a G.M. He said he gets to choose the guest host, and "I'm going to shake things up V.K.M. style." He announced the guest host is Batista. The crowd liked that and almost forgave McMahon for teasing them with their ticket money being refunded.

Batista walked onto the stage. He announced Miz vs. John Cena and Triple H vs. MVP in the first round of a Night of the Champions tournament. He said when Vince asked him to do this, he said no way. He said he's a fighter, a competitor (he means "sports entertainer," for those you absorbed into WWE-speak), he doesn't want to wear a suit. Then Randy Orton's music interrupted and he walked out onto the stage with Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase.

Orton said he shouldn't have come back and he asked what's stopping them from marching to the ring and making him regret it. Batista said before he rudely interrupted him, he was about to say McMahon gave him unlimited power so he can make his life a living nightmare and even fire him if he looks at him wrong. Orton said his life is already a nightmare. He said he barely survived Three Stages of Hell. He said he got hit in the head with a sledgehammer and can barely walk.

Batista mock whined and cried. Batista said he doesn't need to worry about defending his title. He said he needs to worry about the trade Trump made. He said he's booking him against three of the five wrestlers Raw acquired from Smackdown because "I know how much you love three-on-one fights." He said it's time he's on the receiving end of one. No hint yet of the names of the opponents he's facing.

(1) Triple H beat MVP. Lawler wondered who Triple H was standing after what he went through at the PPV last night. MVP dominated early as Triple H sold an injured quad on his left leg, which was wrapped. Triple H avoided a Playmaker at 4:00 and snapped into a Pedigree for the clean win. (3/4*) [c]

A clip aired of Chris Jericho & Edge winning the Unified Tag Team Titles.

Edge and Jericho walked out. Jericho said he vowed to never be on Raw again. As he was about to explain what brought him back, Edge interrupted and said the only reason Jericho is there is because he said they should work as a unified force. He said he demanded from Teddy Long the chance to win the tag titles. He said as tag champs, they can appear on any, adding, "Unfortunately, also including this one." Edge insulted the fans, calling them losers, and was then interrupted by Primo & Carlito.

(2) Edge & Chris Jericho defeated Primo & Carlito Colon for the Unified Tag Team Titles in 8:00. A minute into the match, the Colons knocked the heel duo to the floor, then they cut to an early break. [c] Back from the break the heels were in control, tagging in and out against Primo. Carlito got a hot-tag at 7:00 and went on sustained offense. He hit Edge with his Back Stabber finisher for a near fall, with Jericho breaking it up with a great save (not one of those whimpy stomps but a full diving tackle). Primo knocked Jericho to the floor. Carlito then gave Edge a kneelift. As Carlito set up a springboard on the middle rope, it appeared he got knocked off balance by Primo. He looked angrily down at Primo. The cameras didn't pick up what happened, and the announcers seemed to miss it entirely, and then Edge gave Carlito a spear for the win. The replay showed that Jericho shoved Primo into the ropes, throwing off Carlito. Carlito had some words for Primo afterward, although surely he'll see the video replay and forgive his brother. Right? (*1/2)

Cole and Lawler hyped the Orton gauntlet match scheduled later. [c]

As Orton complained to Rhodes and DiBiase about what Batista was doing to him, Batista walked in and said he forgot to tell him that if Rhodes or DiBiase get involved, he'll fire them on the spot.

Cole and Lawler threw to a video package, billing it as a battle between a mega-star in Cena versus someone trying to become one. Then they showed Cena heading toward the entrance tunnel. [c]

(3) John Cena pinned The Miz in 14:00. Cole asked Lawler if Miz could have learned anything about his loss last night. Lawler said he had to have learned what not to do, comparing it to the lesson people learn when they put their hand on a hot stove. Cena stared down Miz, then got a crowd pop when he took off his t-shirt. Miz scored early with a kneelift, forearm, chop, and kick. Lawler and Cole talked about how Miz did dominate Cena early in the match last night. Cena came back right away with an armdrag, bodyslam, and elbowdrop. Cena settled into a chinlock at 2:00. Miz escaped and applied a side headlock. Lawler said Cena got in people's faces early in his career just as Miz does now, implying Miz might be on Cena's path. Cena went for a bulldog at 4:00, but Miz escaped and leaped over the top rope and snapped Cena's neck-first over the top rope. He followed with a neckbreaker and a near fall. [c] Back from the break, Miz had Cena in a sleeper at 8:00. Lawler again said Miz more than held his own last night most of the match, and perhaps that gave him the confidence necessary to avoid defeat again. Miz blocked an Attitude Adjustment and dropped Cena hard to the mat and scored two consecutive two count near falls. Miz took time to trash-talk Cena. Cena made a brief comeback, but Miz countered with a sleeper. Cena made his faces, and then began to fade. He dropped to one knee and then all the way to the mat. Cena made a comeback by powering out and hitting a series of shoulder blocks and a release side suplex. He signaled for his You Can't See Me routine. He hit Miz with a legdrop off the ropes to the back of his neck and then applied the STF for another clean tapout win. Cole confirmed that sets up Cena vs. Triple H next week. (**3/4) [c]

They went backstage to Rhodes trying to give Orton a pep talk about his challenge. A pacing, stressed out Orton fired back: "Would you shut up!" DiBiase got off his cell and walked over and calmly told Orton he'd be fine if he just survives Orton. He said he just got off the phone with his dad, who told him he will be the guest host next week on Raw. Orton asked how that helps him tonight.

They went to Cole and Lawler at ringside who talked about the Night of Champions PPV. Cole said the winner of the next match would get the shot against Maryse for the Diva's Champion. How many of you knew Maryse was the Diva's Champion?

(4) Mickie James defeated Kelly Kelly and Beth Phoenix and Rose Mendez when she pinned Mendez at 5:00 to earn a shot at Maryse's Divas Title at Night of the Champions. Maryse joined in on commentary. She gave Cole a hard time about how be pronounces her name. He As Phoenix punched Mickie, Rosa stepped in to help and it seemed to upset Phoenix. Mickie avoided a Phoenix suplex and then applied an inverted sleeper. Mendez then put Mickie in a sleeper. Kelly jumped on Mendez's back with her own sleeper. Phoenix escaped and shoved the other three into the corner turnbuckle. Kelly got a near fall on Phoenix after a sunset flip. Mickie moved in and went for a pin, but Mendez broke that up with a backslide of her own. Maryse indicated she wanted to face Kelly if she had a choice, almost to the point of seeming to have a crush on her. Mickie eventually finished Mendez with a DDT. Mickie and Maryse had a staredown afterward, then she hugged Kelly afterward. (*1/4)

A video aired on WWE's program to help kids read.

(5) The Big Show fought Kofi Kingston to a double countout at 3:00. Kofi showed his usual good fighting spirit. Show, though, overpowered him. He knocked him to the floor to defend against being mounted and punched in the corner. Show pressed Kofi, practically poking his finger up his butt in the process, but Kofi slipped out and shoved Show into the ringpost. The ref got to the ten count before either could get back into the ring. A fan held up a sign that said, "Big Slow." Show frowned and walked to the back. Short, but fine. (1/2*) [c]

(6a) Randy Orton pinned Evan Bourne in 4:00. Bourne was revealed to be new to the Raw brand. Lawler talked up Bourne's style. Cole said Orton is so used to wrestling Triple H (tell us about it) that he may not know what to make of the pacing of Bourne. Bourne got in early offense including flying moves and kicks leading to a near fall. Orton gave Bourne a jaw-jacker out of nowhere. Bourne made a comeback and went on a flurry of rapid-moves and Orton seemed slowed by the effects of the PPV beating he took at the PPV. Bourne flew off the top rope. Lawler said Bourne is fun to watch. Bourne set up a top rope move, but Orton got up and knocked him off balance; Bourne straddled the top rope. Orton then gave Bourne a flying bulldog for the win. (*)

(6b) Randy Orton defeated Jack Swagger via countout. Swagger outwrestled Orton early by charging in and then powerslamming him. Swagger did his signature chest pound and then seemed to consider the moment. He then walked out onto the ring apron and got intentionally counted out. He told Orton afterward he has always respected him, so on his first night on Raw (sort of), he wanted to leave a lasting impression. He shook Orton's hand, and Orton accepted it and gave him a half grin.

(6c) Mark Henry pinned Randy Orton in 4:00. Henry said he also came to Raw to make an impression. He said he respects Orton, too. He stepped onto the ring apron and let the ref count. When the ref got to five, Henry grabbed the ref's hand. Henry then began to laugh and he stepped back into the ring and waved his finger at Orton, as if to say he wasn't letting him off that easily. Orton sunk into the corner, like those guys on those Highway Patrol shows do when the cop asks if they will open their trunk for them and they have 250K worth of weed back there. Orton actually got on his knees and begged off. Henry slowly moved in and grabbed Orton by his throat and tossed him hard to the mat. Henry headbutted Orton and then soaked up some cheers. Orton tried to fight back with an RKO, but Henry shoved him away, into the ropes, and then slammed him to the mat with a powerslam. That was a big win for Henry. Do they have big plans for him?

Batista stepped out onto the stage and smiled as Henry celebrated for over a minute.

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THOUGHTS, OBSERVATIONS, NITPICKS

MCMAHON SEGMENT: They are walking on dangerous land by teasing fans with ticket refunds. It's dangerous in general to have a heel character such as McMahon making fans resent giving him their money. It just encourages PPV pirating and skipping house shows to watch free TV instead...

BATISTA AS G.M.: When walked into the ring, he let out that awkward, "Yeah.... ohhh.... yes... oh, it feels good" that always starts his promos. It's just a weird nervous tic he has and it could line up with a porn movie. He went on to say, "I'm excited, we're going to have fun tonight"... When Batista said McMahon gave him the power to do anything, that's all fine and good except McMahon is acting like a heel in every other way, and he even sounded upset that Trump forced this guest host situation on him, yet Batista made it sound like McMahon had the power to give him a lot of leeway or not much, and he decided to give him 100 percent authority. Why would McMahon do that? It just isn't consistent and seems thrown together and sloppy?...

TRIPLE H VS. MVP: Triple H deserves credit for selling an injury from the grueling PPV match the night before. I also can't help but be skeptical that the main reason Triple H sold his taped quad so much is that he wanted a cover story for not being able to easily and quickly squash MVP, as John Cena did to The Miz at the PPV. You see an injured, hobbled Triple H beat MVP in four minutes clean and you realize WWE deserves whatever it gets in terms of lack of credible second tier players rising into the top tier, and that no matter what any younger generation says, they'll rationalize and justify being just as destructive to younger wrestler in order to keep their spots late in their careers when they should be building up new names. It takes strong leadership to overcome that, but McMahon and Co. are not providing it...

JERICHO & EDGE VS. PRIMO & CARLITO: Their tag title win means they can float to all three brands, giving Raw an extra dose of star power. It also waters down the brand split to have Edge and Jericho regularly on Raw because of that. As long as they're only wrestling in tag title defenses, it's fine. But if them having the tag belts means they're just going to be thrown out there in singles matches, too, well, it's cheating on the brand split. Edge vs. Jericho is going to be a top feud in WWE between now and WrestleMania (sooner than later, probably), so I understand wanting to expose the Raw audience to the developments of that storyline. It's enough to make you wonder if they unified the tag titles in part to get to this storyline with Edge and Jericho. Is McMahon still capable of such long-term planning anymore?... Lawler said Carlito doesn't know it wasn't Primo's fault, thus explaining Carlito giving Primo such a hard time afterward. Too bad there's not a gigantic screen in the arena that shows replays of what happened. This is one of those situations where Carlito should find out what happened and it shouldn't be an issue going forward between them...

MIZ VS. CENA: The announcers did a nice job trying to talk up Miz's performance at the PPV the night before, pointing out he controlled a lot of the match. Just talking about a loss can make a loss mean less because it seemed to be something worth analyzing and not just a foregone conclusion Cena would walk over him... Miz had a good, competitive match here and the loss, while solidifying that he's not a threat to Cena, it was long enough and wasn't treated like a squash to prevent Miz from being pushed down the roster. Losing twice cleanly, though, doesn't help move him up, and WWE could use some new blood in the top tier...

ORTON GAUNTLET: Bourne got in enough offense and got to show off what he can do that he wasn't buried or anything by losing to top heel Orton. Swagger's appearance was perfect. I was fearing the worst, which would be Orton disposing of Swagger easily, but instead Swagger showed power early and then smarts by honoring Orton's stature rather than fighting him. It's intriguing to see where that goes. Raw really needed fresh blood, and getting Bourne, Swagger, and even Henry gives Raw writers some new combos to work with. That win for Henry is big. It's not as if Orton had a grueling match against Swagger, and the Bourne match was punishing but ultimately not enough of an excuse for him to fall so easily to Henry. Sure, he was selling the effects of the sledgehammer, but the announcers sure sold Henry's win as a career-high rather than a fluke against a battered and beaten man. I'm not sure of all talent on the roster he's the one I want to see elevated to main events as that means longer and more frequent Henry matches. He's certainly "paid his dues," though.

OTHER THOUGHTS: They came back from a commercial break at two minutes before the top of the hour, assuring that Cena would be in the ring at the start of the second hour, a pivotal point in a show's ratings pattern. TNA is routinely at a commercial during this key time due to sloppy formatting, but WWE is pretty meticulous, especially on Raw, with planning everything out so they can have a hot act in the ring at the start of the second hour during a time when tens of thousands of potential viewers are shopping around for a show to invest themselves in. Obviously, being at a commercial during the time all other shows are starting is a big disadvantage... It was huge news that McMahon broke at the start of the show regarding five wrestlers from each brand switching places. It really lost steam by the time Show vs. Kofi was taking place since the announcers barely talked about it. Shouldn't they have been openly wondering and speculating about the impact of some potentially major talent shifts?...

QUOTEBOOK

Nothing this week really stood out. Not much talking on this show compared to usual, and Lawler barely chimed in with his usual one-liners short of a reference to a Diva being "hotter than sunburn."

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