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CORNER CUBE FRIDAY 4/4: TNA Impact - Matt Morgan Show ... Why?
Apr 4, 2008 - 2:18:27 PM |
By James Caldwell, Torch columnist
Updated daily from the corner cubicle, Torch columnist James Caldwell's weekday blog focuses on hot topic current events and other items of interest from around wrestling.
Updated Friday, April 4, 2008
TNA Impact. A few observations.
- What was with the Team Cage t-shirts? Seriously, now. Was the t-shirt store down the street offering a discount on Print Pressing in bulk? The intent was to show unity between this eclectic mix, but these shirts sent a far worse message than any WWE wrestler sporting the official PPV t-shirt to convey "I'm a jobber". Christian Cage's shirt was far too large for his frame, making him look like a small child. It also appears that TNA bypassed the Photoshop route and settled for the comes-with-Windows-and-you'll-like-it Microsoft Paint.
- Hurry, call your cable operator and order... Sacrifice? Mike Roe and I discussed this one last night in the Gmail chat. (Yes, we do talk out the show prior to recording C&R audio for those of you wondering.) We suddenly would rather see Kurt Angle vs. Scott Steiner in May, and we currently do not care for Angle vs. Joe in nine days. "Take a pay-per-view you're excited for, and make you not want to buy it anymore," Roe said.
Yes, TNA has successfully created excitement for Backlash and not WrestleMania. And what's with Joe training in the loose-fitting t-shirt? What's with all of these men in t-shirts? I guess they must have all other men look fat and out-of-shape so that Matt Morgan can look like a stud via juxtaposition. Yes, buy Lockdown for Morgan in Cut-off Shirt!
- Matt Morgan Show... Why? Matt Morgan is apparently the future of TNA one week after he was in approximately five seconds worth of content on the live show. Things started off rough for the former stutterer, as I have no idea what he said in the opening promo. TNA even tried to doctor the footage with some crafty editing, but that only made it worse. Poor Christian tried his best to save the segment, but there was no saving that mess.
- TNA: Cross the Line. Apparently this means cross the line in good taste. Kurt Angle made a racist joke about Samoa Joe, which generated zero heat because everyone knew it was just a dumbly-written heel line. If you're going to be racist, at least draw heat with it. Otherwise, it's tasteless and bad for business.
And then there's Kip James being scripted to call Bob Armstrong a victim of a "drive-by" at the wrong place, wrong time. I could pull up about ten news stories right now on innocent children who are victims of drive-bys at school or near their homes. That's not the type of analogy you want the TV program to be associated with.
- Knockouts C-level brawl. Kong, ODB, and Gail Kim could not be bothered to participate in the women's brawl because TNA apparently has so many women on their roster that a C-level division has been created. It seems like only yesterday that NWO C-team members Scott Norton and Virgil were taking their lumps in the ring on Monday and Thursday nights. Now, TNA has Crossed The Line with the women's version of faction warfare.
- Val. Hot tub. Ringside. I have come to a conclusion that in an effort for TNA to copy everything from the WCW era, they must now include a pool or inflatable hot tub ringside for So Cal Val to entertain the fans and cheer on the good guys. (Well the wrestlers who seem to be good guys unless they cross that line into kinda-sorta-good guys...until we decide next week whether they have crossed the line.) Back to the hot tub idea. You will of course remember the Spring Break Nitros from Florida where the ring was next to a pool. I am shocked - shocked! - that TNA has not found a way to copy this yet.
- Who's the mystery final Ultimate Xscape participant? Not that it matters who the final participant in the Ultimate Xscape match is, but I have not read spoilers to find out who this final person is. So, I have narrowed down the list of potential candidates. Amazing Red returns from obscurity, D-Ray 3000 returns from deep obscurity, Sonny Siaki returns from relative obscurity, Jerry Lynn returns from wherever he's been, Eric Young finds a way to be in two places at once, or Low-Ki returns and just kicks ass on everyone. I'll take Low-Ki to save us from this mess.
***
Updated Thursday, April 3, 2008
Q: What does The Rock owe to the wrestling business?
A: Absolutely nothing.
One of the hot topic controversies coming out of the Hall of Fame ceremony surrounds Dwayne Johnson and his behavior at the ceremony. He went too long. He talked about himself too much. He roasted too many people. He brushed off some people. He didn't stick around afterward. He didn't talk to people before.
To me, this sounds like the usual case of insecurity and jealousy that permeates the wrestling business when guys are always competing for spots and opportunities. The insecurity is pretty easy to explain.
I'll relate a story my dentist told me about the wedding he recently hosted for one of his daughters. There were about 200 people there, and it was impossible to engage in a full conversation with every person, as there's much more to hosting a wedding than just the first dance. So, he spent the next two weeks trying to be gracious by making calls to apologize because many guests felt slighted by their own perceived lack of attention.
Simply put, there was selfishness at the wedding from guests who felt slighted. By the same token, it's unfair to believe Johnson could meet and greet and listen to me-me-me stories from hundreds of former colleagues when his time was limited. The me-mentality is: "He didn't say hi to me, so he must be too good for us." I wasn't there, but I'll take Jim Ross's word from his blog today that Johnson was not aloof, as some wrestlers and personnel made it out to seem.
The jealousy part plays into why he doesn't owe the wrestling business anything. Johnson has a successful career doing movies, but some folks would apparently rather him suffer in the wrestling business rather than be successful outside of the business.
Every time Johnson is successful, it's a positive for the wrestling business. It shows that the people who are a product of the wrestling business aren't a bunch of smelly, dumb jocks who can barely lace their own boots. Every time Johnson is successful, it enhances the perception of the wrestling business because his name (real and wrestling) will always be linked to the business.
He doesn't owe the wrestling business anything not only because he promote the business every time he has a successful movie, but he also gave his blood, sweat, and entertainment when he was part of the business. Every time fans paid money to see him in the ring or on the mic, he gave them a show.
Johnson provided the entertainment that ultimately propelled his career at the same time. It's called capitalism. He input much and he received much in return. Fans asked for much and Johnson gave them much. Why should he be asked to give in abundance of what he already provided? Fans should appreciate what he already provided when he was an integral part of one of the most successful periods in wrestling history.
The wrestling business has taken so much from many wrestlers. Many of those wrestlers are the ones who are insecure and jealous of Johnson's success. Meanwhile, Johnson figured out how to use the wrestling business to produce a second career where he didn't have to give into the demands of wrestling, but he could save his body and work on his terms. That should be celebrated.
But, instead, those who are consumed by the business would rather build themselves up and hide their insecurities by knocking Johnson, who found a way out and isn't begging on a street corner or doing another reunion show to earn a living post-wrestling.
Johnson doesn't owe the wrestling business anything. The wrestlers inside the business owe him a "thank you" for paving a path of more opportunities. John Cena wouldn't be doing movies if not for Johnson. Cena owes Johnson, not the other way around.
***
Updated Wednesday, April 2, 2008
How do you put into words the television show known as ECW on Sci-Fi? It's just this show that happens for 65 minutes every Tuesday night and then disappears into a tape library immediately upon the conclusion of the show, never to be heard from again.
It exists, and then it ceases to exist. Raw is obviously the flagship show, while Smackdown has a place on the weekend calendar even though nothing ever happens on the show. But, ECW, on the other hand occurs in a vacuum.
ECW is simply a show that gives WWE an extra hour of television each week to mix and match wrestlers in hopes of finding some useful combinations to lead into one match per PPV and one match coming out of each PPV.
Kane is your new ECW champion, but as Mike Roe and I were talking about on the Gmail chat last night, what is Kane? Why does this character exist on the television? We can't figure out his motivations or why fans are supposed to cheer for him.
It's as if Kane has achieved a certain level of veteran status after being part of the Attitude era. He's like a non-jobber version of Val Venis. You just cheer the guy because he's been doing the same gimmick on your TV for ten years and you're familiar with it.
I almost long for the days of Kane's voice being audible to himself and to the millions watching at home. (May 19!) At least then, when Kane and WWE were promoting "See No Evil", we could figure out the character. (May 19!) He was a nutcase. And he was evil. And he did evil stuff. Now, he just does stuff. (May 19!) And the character exists in a vacuum just like this show.
On the other hand, there's the greatest 15-second match of all time between Colin Delaney and Big Show. Colin was ridiculed for buying into Armando's April Fools joke, which made for great TV. All we needed was Tommy Dreamer turning heel by presenting the contract to Colin before ripping it up in Colin's face simultaneous to Armando announcing Colin was the butt of a joke.
Alas, we got Big Show apologetically beating Colin senselessly. No one sells fear and trepidation better than Colin, who tried to sneak around the giant. Show was great playing a sympathetic figure who was simply asked to complete a task, with the shoulder shrug representing his apology for the following beating. It was like Show was teaching his son a lesson, but only after the wife told him to Man Up and inflict punishment.
As for the rest of the show, Shelton Benjamin apparently forgot his lines, but who can blame him? I would try to forget my lines if handed half of the stuff they write for this show. Then, there's Stevie Richards. I don't get it, nor do I worry about it anymore. And last but not least, everyone don't do The Knox. Heaven forbid that twirl Mike Knox does when he comes out on stage catches on. The last thing we need is The Knox to be the next hit dance craze. Next thing you know, Rock 'n Rave will be doing it on Impact to keep TNA relevant.
***
Updated Tuesday, April 1, 2008
The following news item was intercepted by Corner Cube intelligence prior to being published by the AP. Remember, today is April Fool's Day.
Former WrestleMania headliner and current producer of a reality show on a country music channel, Hulk Hogan, was charged with three counts of attempting to steal the show at WrestleMania on Sunday night. Corner Cube news services have confirmed through multiple sources in the Orlando police department that Hogan was released on $100 bail after it was determined Hogan acted alone and was unsuccessful in his plot.
TMZ was on the scene and captured a disgruntled Hogan leaving the police station while covering his face with a copy of the National Enquirer.
"I missed that phone call about the grill! George Foreman should be begging on a street corner not grilling burgers on holidays!" Hogan reportedly shouted at onlookers. "I wasn't about to let Vince get away with running WrestleMania in my backyard and having that no-talent son induct Eddie Graham into the Hall."
Hogan calmed down and told a reporter that he outdrew The Rock, Steve Austin, and Ric Flair combined during his career and couldn't stand to see them at his Hall of Fame.
"How could WWE have a WrestleMania without a marquee match like Hogan versus anything - like a waffle iron?" Hogan asked anyone who was listening. "You got all these guys talking about stealing the show. Flair said he wrestled twice on Sunday. Try babysitting that nut case, Mr. T, at the first WrestleMania and see how you like that. So I took it upon myself to steal the show for all the Hulkamaniacs."
TMZ footage shows Hogan then slipping by reporters and escaping into his awaiting limo where Brooke Hogan's ten closest friends awaited to offer their support.
Orlando police successfully recovered the show after Hogan's attempted theft. Hogan has a history of suspicious activity at WrestleMania. Police records in California indicate Hogan was charged with excessive milking of an audience in a crowded theater at the WrestleMania 21 Hall of Fame in Los Angeles. Hogan denies the accusations.
Calls placed to WWE's public relations department on Monday night to comment on the situation in Orlando were unsuccessful.
The voice mail greeting stated: "We are currently away from the phone watching Ric Flair's farewell ceremony. If you request immediate assistance, please dial the operator or contact Brian Gewirtz, who is pouting in a corner."
***
About half-a-day removed from Raw, the ending of this show still feels surreal. There he was - Ric Flair having a transcendent moment on WWE Television with WWE paying the ultimate respect to the best performer in wrestling history. No run-ins. No heel interruptions. Nothing but class, respect, and honor shown to Ric Flair. You couldn't have written a better ending this chapter in Ric Flair's career.
The end of Raw represented the official end of an era. The last two or three weeks, I've seen it written in several different places that this is the end of an era in the wrestling business. I didn't really buy into it, as it just seemed to make for a good headline or topic. Monday night, though, it struck me like Maria's slap upside Santino's head that we were witnessing the official close of The Era in pro wrestling.
It's funny that Randy Orton referenced the Hulkamania and Attitude eras in the opening segment to proclaim the beginning of his own era. Well, we can know summarize this story about eras by saying the end of the territory era, Hulkamania, and the Attitude/Monday Night Wars were simply part of the timeline that is The Era of Ric Flair.
Where does the wrestling business go from here? Sure, in two weeks, we'll be talking about storylines, Backlash, and good, bad, and ugly TV. But, what can surpass the final 20 minutes of television that concluded this episode of Raw? It was simply an amazing scene that cannot be topped.
If George Clooney is the last movie star, then Ric Flair is the last great pro wrestler. WWE has Cena, Hunter, Michaels, Undertaker, Edge, Big Show, and Orton. But, put all of them together and they still don't match up to what Ric Flair meant to the pro wrestling business over his career and during The Era.
As for the rest of the show, this was easily one of the best post-Mania editions of Raw in some time. Everyone was assuredly sore, tired, and ready to kick their feet up on the sofa after a very long and rewarding weekend in Orlando. But, I haven't seen more energy in the building and effort in the ring on Raw in several months. Everyone wanted to steal the show on Flair's Farewell Night, which made for great TV leading to Flair's final moment.
There's a time and a place to discuss the matches and storylines that came out of this show to keep WWE chugging along into the next era. WWE effectively made that transition without pushing post-Mania developments too hard, while keeping an eye on giving Flair a proper send-off.
At the end of the day, this night belonged to Ric Flair. WWE handled the moment with class, and everyone involved should be proud to be part of one of the most special nights in wrestling history.
Updated Monday, March 31, 2008
Raw is Flair. There was a time when the Raw after WrestleMania was one of the most important shows of the year. It was a chance to re-set everything and introduce new characters to the mix, with WrestleMania serving as the end of one mini-era and the beginning of a new mini-era.
After WrestleMania 14, the Steve Austin era was ushered in, and DX was also reborn with the surprise return of Sean Waltman. After WrestleMania 19, Goldberg debuted in WWE to begin a program against The Rock.
In recent years, the Raw after WrestleMania has been a pretty bad show. Wrestlers, announcers, writers, and management have been hung over - figuratively, and in some cases, literally - from the WrestleMania festivities that everyone goes through the motions trying to get through Monday. Imagine playing the Super Bowl and then starting training camp the very next day.
With Ric Flair losing last night's retirement match against Shawn Michaels, tonight's Raw is the perfect opportunity to have a follow-up show all about Ric Flair. There's no need to immediately start pushing for Backlash, as that can wait until next week when everyone has a week to recover and put quality thought into the next PPV.
WWE can make things simple by making it the Ric Flair show tonight for one final farewell. It certainly appears to be the case for tonight's show, as Jim Ross said in his blog this afternoon that you might want to record this show for a memory that will last a lifetime.
Fireball at the Citrus Bowl. Have you seen the home video of the fireworks explosion in the Citrus Bowl at the end of WrestleMania? It's amazing more people weren't hurt or seriously injured when the pyro took on a life of its own.
WWE's quick apology earlier today was a good call, but there will assuredly be claims filed against the company and other involved parties, especially based on what the injured people were saying about poor response time and lackluster help from stadium and fire personnel.
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