By Wade Keller, PWTorch editor

KELLER'S WWE RAW REPORT - HOUR TWO
NOVEMBER 23, 2009
HERSHEY, PA.

[Q5]

3 -- C.M. PUNK vs. JOHN CENA (in progress)

Punk went for a Go To Sleep out of nowhere, but Cena escaped and applied the STF. Punk reached the bottom rope to force a break. When Cena went after him, he round kicked him to the side of the head and scored a two count. Cena avoided a bulldog attempt by Punk, then hit Punk with a legdrop off the ropes to the back of Cena's neck. That was good for only a two count. Lawler said Cena has to be wondering what it'll take to pin Punk. Cena lifted Punk for an FU, but Cena fought out of it and flew at Cena with a flying hook kick to the face. Cena, though, did finish Punk a minute later with an Attitude Adjustment off the middle rope.

WINNER: Cena in 11:00.

STAR RATING: **3/4 -- Good match.

-They showed Lawler and Cole at ringside. They continued to talk about Ventura's "revolutionary" theme to the show. They threw to a clip of the Ventura-Orton segment, which a good percentage of viewers surely missed.

-Backstage, Vince McMahon approached Jesse Ventura. He was gregarious and said, "It's good to see you haven't changed a bit!" McMahon said if he planned to challenge him to a match, the answer is no. Ventura asked, "Why would I stoop so low as to wrestle you. When I wrestled, you didn't wrestle. You were an announcer." He told him he can breath easy. He said he's going to hit him below the belt mentally where he knows it'll hurt. Ventura said he's sure there's many conspiracies in WWE with him in charge. McMahon interrupted and said he probably wants to have a photo op with a billionaire. Ventura said he was in charge of a $32 billion budget in Minnesota. He called WWE a pip-squeak operation compared to that. McMahon demanded to know what he wanted. Ventura said he's going to do to him what his father did to him. He said he's one of the few people in the arena who remember when his dad was in charge. He said his dad had so little confidence in him, he didn't run any part of the company, he made him an announcer. This sounds like a message to Shane McMahon to convey to him that he was given a bigger vote of confidence by his dad than Vince Sr. gave to Vince Jr. Ventura then revealed they're going to return to the announce booth together. Cool. McMahon disgustingly told Ventura he hasn't changed a bit. He presented him with a tuxedo to wear so he looks proper on the air. "We're going back to what your father knew you could, or at least thought you could do." He then presented him with a red bow tie, too. "If you're not Bozo the Clown, you're his twin brother." [c]

[Q6]

-WWE Fact: WWE offers all U.S. military personal free tickets to all live events in the U.S.

4 -- CHRIS MASTERS & JACK SWAGGER & CHAVO GUERRERO vs. MVP & MARK HENRY & R-TRUTH -- Qualification Match

To get an idea of how deceptively big Swagger is, he's got an inch or two on Masters, who seems tall, and a foot on Chavo. Cole and Lawler chuckled and took friendly digs at one another over being replaced by McMahon and Ventura. Lawler said McMahon went from host of Raw to a billionaire, while Cole "started out with nothing and still has most of it left." At 3:00 Henry pressed and threw Chavo onto Swagger at ringside. Masters went for a big boot against Truth, but Truth ducked and hit Masters with his finisher for the win.

WINNERS: Henry & MVP & R-Truth in 3:00.

-They cut backstage to Triple H snarling at Shawn Michaels, who was in cartoon nervous mode, tapping his fingers together. Triple H asked what was up with that kick last night. Michaels said it was for the championship and he figured he was going to Pedigree him anyway. Triple H admitted he was, but told Michaels not to turn it around on him. Michaels said, "You know I have the whole dodgy eye thing going. If it makes you feel any better, I was aiming for Cena." In walked a little person in a suit. He slapped Michaels with a lawsuit. They have to go to "little people's court" next Monday. Puns followed, such as: "That's short notice." [c]

-Evan Bourne came out to face Primo Colon. Then Primo stepped onto the stage. Orton ambushed Primo and beat him down near the stage. Then he walked to the ring and told the ref he's in the match now and ring the bell. Ventura appeared on the big screen and told them to shut things down out there. He addressed Orton and said he's been on his case since he arrived tonight. He said because he's been persistence, rules are made to be broken. He said he broke every rule when he wrestled and when he announced, and he can break his own rules. He said he'll break a rule just for him. He said if he can beat Bourne, he will put him in the battle royal and get a chance at the World Title. "Persistency pays off," he said. "I like your style."

5 -- EVAN BOURNE vs. EVAN BOURNE -- Qualifying Match

Orton threw Bourne into the ringpost and scored an early two count. He quickly catapulted him into the bottom rope for another two count. Bourne made a brief comeback and hit a double flying knee drop onto Orton for a near fall. Orton turned a springboard bodyblock attempt by Bourne into a powerslam. Bourne then gave Orton an RKO for the win.

WINNER: Orton in 2:00.

[Q7]

-Cole threw to a video package of highlights of McMahon and Ventura doing on-camera introductions as an announcing team. Ah, the memories. I don't think in even one of those clips were they actually at the arena. Back in the day they did all post-production work and they were standing in front of a blue screen (Chroma-key) that projected the crowd behind them (think Stephen Colbert's viewer video contests). [c]

-Cole introduced the World Premiere of the trailer for the Ted DiBiase-starring movie "Marine II." It goes straight to DVD on Dec. 29th.

-They showed Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase chatting backstage.

6 -- MICHELLE MCCOOL & LAYLA & JILLIAN HALL vs. MICKIE JAMES & MELINA & KELLY KELLY --Thanksgiving Mayflower Mele Match

The heels were dressed as Pilgrims and didn't seem happy about it at all. Lawler chortled over their outfits and music. "They've made us do some stupid things in the past, but this is by far the stupidest," said McCool. Justin interrupted McCool and introduced the guest timekeeper, the Gobbledy Gooker. Every generation of fans should get to experience him. They cut to a break before the babyfaces came out. [c]

[Q8]

Lawler said the pronunciation is "Guh-ker, not Goo-ker." Then they played a clip of Gene Okerlund from Survivor Series 1990 revealing the original Gooker, which he pronounced "Goo-ker." Cole acknowledged that Gene pronounced it "Goo-ker," too. Lawler expressed a couple times that it's not "politically correct" to refer to Native Americans as Indians. Cole said that's how history books refer to them and added that Ventura isn't politically correct anyway.

WINNERS: Mickie & Melina & Kelly in 2:00 when Melina pinned Jillian.

-Lawler entered the ring to interview the winners. As Lawler talked with Melina (Mickie and Kelly left for some reason), The Gooker entered the ring to celebrate with her. The Gooker then attacked her and pulled off the headpiece to reveal herself as Maryse. Lawler was going to intervene, by McCool cast a spell on him by shoving her palm toward him with her fingers spread. He backed off as if in a trance. She stripped herself of the entire outfit, although it didn't go particularly smoothly. She was not an ace at undressing herself. She then posted for the camera and gloated.

-Cole plugged the DX vs. Hart Dynasty tag match. Then a video package aired on last night's Survivor Series, including clips of Undertaker retaining his title, plus Sheamus, Drew McIntyre, and The Miz winning, plus the Hunter-Michaels-Cena main event. Then they pushed the replays. I wonder if WWE has ever considered discounting the replays, so people who can't afford the $40 (and soon $45!) pricetag could still experience the events for, say, $30, but those who could afford the premium price would get the exclusive feeling of being among those seeing it live? [c]

-WWE Fact: WWE TV programs can be seen in 465 million homes, more than the NBA, MLB, and NFL combined.

-Ring introduced took place for the DX vs. Hart Dynasty match to end the second hour.

QUOTEBOOK

Jesse Ventura: "Your father didn't believe in you, Vince McMahon. It was so obvious because why? He made you an announcer. That's where he knew you couldn't get into any trouble. So he was protecting his business, who had virtually no talent, so you make him an announcer."

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