By James Caldwell, Torch columnist

ECW on Sci-Fi TV Report
April 22, 2008 - Year 2, Week 46 (Week 98 overall)
Taped in Greensboro, N.C.
Report by James Caldwell, Torch columnist

We start the show with Mike Adamle welcoming us to Super Tuesday in Greensboro. Tonight, Edge will get in the mind of Kane on the Cutting Edge.

In-ring action started with Kelly Kelly coming to the ring for a mixed tag match. Tommy Dreamer came out as her partner. Adamle appears to be reading lines scripted word-for-word. Layla then came out as the other side of the opposition, prior to Mike Knox doing his spin on stage before storming to the ring. Adamle said Knox is man on a mission in 2008. Can I get a shout-out to Mo and Oscar one time?

1 -- KELLY KELLY & TOMMY DREAMER vs. LAYLA & MIKE KNOX

Match started with divas, then Dreamer and Knox took tags. Knox landed a hard clothesline, but Dreamer came back with a running bulldog. Adamle said he "taps off" to Kelly Kelly to bring her into the ring. I believe he was confusing tapping out with tagging out. The divas exchanged holds in the ring, then Kelly finished off Layla with the Rocker Dropper for the win. Adamle was a little arriving at the party to count the three count.

After the match, Knox interrupted Dreamer's celebration with Kelly and gave him a big corkscrew face plant. Dreamer said Knox wanted to give him something to...um...dream about. Knox left the ring in a huff while Kelly checked on Dreamer. Tazz said Knox is playing for keeps. He stood on top of the stage and stared into the ring while Adamle gave an abrupt lead to commercial. Rough.

WINNERS: Kelly & Dreamer in 4:00. Well, that was quick. Just when Adamle was starting to get warmed up, the match ended and appeared to catch Adamle off guard. Knox's saga continues. (1/2*)

[Commercial Break]

Prez video package: They aired abbreviated clips of Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, and John McCain's speeches that aired on Raw last night. ... Announcers: They showed Adamle and Tazz on camera, with Adamle thanking the candidates for appearing on the show last night. He looked down at his run sheet to remember he was supposed to thank the WWE fans for Smacking down their vote.

In-ring: John Morrison came to the ring with Mike The Miz for a singles match. Miz joined Adamle and Tazz on commentary. Miz quickly mocked Adamle's commentary from last week. Jimmy Yang and Shannon Moore then came to the ring.

[Q2]

2 -- JOHN MORRISON (w/The Miz) vs. JIMMY WANG YANG (w/Shannon Moore)

Morrison started on the offensive while Tazz and Miz talked smack to each other with more references to Adamle's commentary. Tazz said Miz isn't making a lot of friends with their dirt sheet. Adamle stumbled on Yang's name, and Miz cut him off before he could finish. Miz emphasized his name is The Miz and asked don't-call-me The Tazz to confirm. Miz was overconfident about Morrison, and he denied Morrison was in any trouble during the match. Yang then came off the top with a moonsault on Morrison for the pin and the win. "Are you kidding me?!" Miz shouted into his headset. Afterward, Miz and Morrison argued about Morrison screwing up.

WINNER: Yang in 3:00. This was basically WWE trying to own the criticism of their announcer by using a heel, Miz, to offer the criticism everyone brought up the past six days. Adamle was a good sport about the ribbing from Miz. Match was an afterthought to the commentary. (1/2*)

[Commercial Break]

Raw Rebound: They focused on William Regal winning the King of the Ring tournament last night. ... Announcers: Adamle said it's pretty amazing Regal is the Raw G.M. and the King of the Ring. Yes, that is utterly amazing. Adamle and Tazz then awkwardly broke down the Backlash PPV card on Sunday.

Backstage: Kofi Kingston was doing some exercises backstage when Shelton Benjamin walked over to him. Kofi talked up Shelton as the gold standard, then offered a handshake prior to their match. Shelton laughed then said Kofi's undefeated streak ends tonight. He walked off and Kofi shot him a look.

[Commercial Break]

[Q3]

3 -- SHELTON BENJAMIN vs. KOFI KINGSTON

Kofi went for a flying move early in the match, but Shelton caught him in fireman's carry position and nailed a shoulder breaker. Kofi went up top at 3:00 for a high-risk move, but Shelton met him with a dropkick in mid-air. 80 percent Tazz on commentary here to match Shelton's 80 percent offense early on. Shelton tried to land a standing kick, but Kofi ducked and surprised Shelton with the buzzsaw roundhouse kick for the pin and the win. Adamle: Jamaican me Crazy; Kofi is still undefeated. They abruptly cut to a Backlash promo.

WINNER: Kofi Kingston in 5:00. Seriously, what else is on the show is so important that they couldn't give Shelton and Kofi more than five minutes in the ring? Finish definitely came out of nowhere and didn't feel like the right way to end the match. (*)

[Commercial Break]

Raw video: They aired clips from the fake Hillary vs. fake Obama match last night. They focused on Bill trying to overshadow Hillary prior to the match. And then, Umaga smashing everyone except Bill. ... Back in the building, Adamle offered congratulations to Hillary Clinton for winning the PA primary tonight.

In-ring: There were men in the ring after the video package aired.

4 -- MARK HENRY vs. NUNZIO

Adamle announced last week's episode of ECW TV was the most-downloaded episode in ECW history. There was a reason for that. Henry with a big front slam for the win. Adamle suggested Nunzio be put to sleep with euthanasia.

WINNER: Henry in 2:00. Not sure why this match aired or occurred or was even conceived. Is Henry even on the ECW brand? I've lost track of these men with the non-existent brand split. (n/a)

Backstage: They focused on Kane's eyeball then pulled back to reveal his sinister face. He's on the Cutting Edge next.

[Q4]

[Commercial Break]

Video package: They aired a video on the European Tour that WWE just concluded.

In-ring: Edge walked out to the ring with Hawkins and Ryder. I'd like to hear Tony Chimel on commentary ahead of Mike Adamle. Just one week of Chimel describing the action rather than just announcing men coming to the ring. Edge welcomed us to the Cutting Edge segment that he brought to ECW for reals. He welcomed out his special guest, Kane.

Cutting Edge: Kane finished his intro, then Edge asked him to have a seat. Kane silently refused. Edge said family is so important in this business. He said many people off the streets think the Brothers of Destruction are the best family in wrestling. Edge said that's especially true when Kane is ECW champion and Undertaker is...grr...the...grr...World Hvt. champion. Edge sold his frustration well there. Kane reminded us that his parents are dead. He said Edge might join them if he goes there.

Edge told Kane to calm down and realize his life sucks. He said Kane can trace it back to his dysfunctional family. Edge said Kane hid under a mask and the scars from the burns were only mental. He said Kane has had on-again-off-again relationships with his brother and women, including Lita. Edge said she left Kane for him. Kane let that sink in while turning his neck in frustration. Edge then said he was about to marry Lita when Kane ruined their wedding day. The fans chanted, "You suck" as Edge paused to collect himself and fast-forward to now.

He said Kane put him out of action, which was almost a blessing in disguise because during that time, he met the most beautiful woman in the world. "I met Vickie Guerrero," he said. Kane asked Edge if he's really thanking him for that. Edge said Vickie is his everything. He said Hawkins and Ryder are like his sons. Chavo is his nephew. Bam Neeley is the second cousin he's just getting to know. But things aren't going great when Kane and Taker stole the family heirlooms - ECW and World Title belts.

Kane said after Backlash, Edge won't have the titles and he won't have much of a family left. Kane vowed to destroy Edge's nephew and make sure Edge never gets a chance to get to know his second cousin. Kane said Undertaker will add another two victims to the family tragedy: Hawkins and Ryder. He said the only person remaining will be Vickie Guerrero all by herself. Kane said him and Taker will take real...good...care...of...her. "I promise!" he said with a maniacal laugh.

[Q5 -- over-run]

All heck broke loose on the Cutting Edge, with the Edge Family storming the ring to attack Kane. They ganged up on him, then Edge brought two chairs into the ring. Edge placed Kane's leg inside a chair, then he gave another chair to Chavo. As the E.F. held down Kane in the ring, Chavo surveyed whether he should smash Kane's leg. After thinking it over, Chavo repeatedly smashed Kane's leg with a chair shot. Kane clutched his left knee in pain while the Family left the ring and stood tall on stage. Adamle with a good send-off, asking whether Kane will be able to make it to Backlash in five days to defend his ECW Title.

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