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By Bob Garver

Hello, everyone at the Torch. Bob Garver here. Long time reader, first-time contributor. Just wanted to pass along a few notes from the big wrestling fanfest held this past weekend in McVeytown. But first, I have to thank the event’s organizers. The Country Memories committee always does an amazing job with their annual Memorial Day weekend festival, and this year they added the planning for this event to their already-busy schedules without missing a beat. Big props to them on that.

Now, onto the report:

-The event started as the first WrestleMania started, with Tito Santana. He signed his full name to his first autograph, but for the next half-dozen or so only signed "Tito Sant." Apparently, his first effort was successful, but in his next seven he came up short.

-Up next was WrestleMania II main-eventer King Kong Bundy. He seemed antsy to get out of the room and away from the fans. He even went for the door on several occasions. But every time he did, he would be dragged back in – by the cries of disappointed children.

-Representing WrestleMania III was "King" Harley Race. Came out wearing a suit and brass knucks. He called everybody "sunshine" and told everyone that his favorite wrestler in today's WWE was "Youmanga." It was sad to see such a great legend being forced to work a silly Regal gimmick.

-Out next was WrestleMania IV's "The Rock" Don Muraco. People at the fanfest were instructed not to refer to him as "The Magnificent Muraco," as he had inexplicably sold this name to Jason Statham. Everyone was disappointed in him for giving up his nickname to a hack action movie star.

-The Red Rooster represented WrestleMania V. There was some confusion here that left many fans disappointed. They were looking forward to finally meeting the Gobbeldy Gooker.

-WrestleMania VI star The Ultimate Warrior was up next. He made it through the entire autograph session without saying anything racist, homophobic, or sociopathic. In case you haven't guessed by now, this is an April Fool's article.

-Up next was WrestleMania VII's Jake "The Snake" Roberts. It took him awhile to find his way to the autograph table, as he was stumbling around taking swings at the air. Some of the younger fans thought he was reenacting his Blindfold Match with Rick Martel. The rest of us really wanted to believe that, but sadly knew better.

-Next out was WrestleMania VIII's Sid Justice. To his credit, he signed every autograph despite having a Vicious headache. Someone suggested that he try to sleep it off, but Sid refused to lie down.

-Out came Giant Gonzales from WrestleMania IX. Another person who was generous with his time. He never once moved from the table. In fact, come to think of it, he never moved at all.

-Rounding out the evening was the main attraction – WrestleMania X's Bret "The Hitman" Hart. Bret showed up in a bad mood because he had been to the Hollywood Casino in Grantville and come out several hundred dollars in the red. But despite suffering a huge loss earlier in the evening, he managed to win what really counted – the fans' hearts.

Of course, I'm kidding about the fanfest in McVeytown. But I wasn't kidding about the Country Memories committee always doing a great job with their Memorial Day weekend celebration. If you have the chance to check them out this year, I'd strongly recommend you do so.

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