DEJ Experience District DEJ BLOG: Ask the Experience: What we've never revealed before for fear of public ridicule Mar 18, 2008 - 2:23:34 PM

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Happy Tuesday, or whatever day you decide to read this. Welcome back for another edition of “Ask The Audio Experience.” This week we went a little lighter on the questions, but it is for a good reason. The reasoning for this is, um, yeah, poor organization. I tried getting Eric on the phone last night to figure it out, but all I heard when he answered the phone were screaming cats and laughter. So it was a typical Monday evening at the Nelson Estate. Dusty is kind enough to explain a constant show reference so everyone take notice, as it is probably the last time you will get an answer. So, without any further adieu, let’s get to your questions. Okay, just two of them this week. Hey, we gotta keep this going somehow.

Derekstellar asks: Hey Dusty, could you please explain the Coke Bottle Castration analogy in depth?

Dusty responds: The short answer involves a young Dusty stealing a joke from some unknown comedian, who referred to being castrated with a Coke bottle outside a 7-Eleven as one of the most unpleasant things he could possibly think of. The long answer involves some silly string, some potting soil, and a secret underground cave where the cure for cancer may one day be found and then destroyed in spite.

TheTrayvor asks: What are big secrets the Experience junkies want to know that you guys also enjoyed in wrestling but don't want to admit for fear of public ridicule? I'll be honest and say I really wanted to see where the character Mordecai was going to go. At least into an Undertaker feud.

Eric responds: I don't know if this is as shameful as, say, owning an Ace of Base CD, which I do, or staying up all night listening to Mariah Carey's Christmas album, like (name omitted) did one time, but I used to be a huge Jeff Jarrett fan. I watched him on ESPN when the network aired USWA programming from both Memphis and Dallas, I read about him in Pro Wrestling Illustrated and that family of magazines (including seeing all the pictures of the Jerry Lawler & Jeff Jarrett vs. the Moondogs matches), and I was happy to see him come to the WWF as a heel country singer. I would always quote the "J-E-double-F ha ha" garbage, and I would do that exaggerated Jackie Fargo strut of his up and down the living room, up and down the hallways of school, and up and down the path of my popularity. Yeah, I sucked as a kid then, and I suck as a person now. But he sucks as a wrestler (don't sue me), so I guess you live and you learn. Okay, I gotta go, there's a sale at Kohl's on white pants and leather jackets that light up. Goodbye!

Dusty responds: Hmm, if being a good question means asking something that Dusty doesn't know how to answer, then this is right up there among the greatest questions in the history of the universe. I will say that if I like something, I will pretty much be open about it right away, because I could give a care about what the rest of the internet community thinks about something. A shining example of this would be Sid, who everyone on the internet hates, but who ranks among my favorite wrestlers. Sid ruled. Another example would be Shelton Benjamin, but I won't give away any details here. You'll have to read my column on Friday to find out what I'm talking about here.

Kevin responds: There exists photographic evidence that my younger brother and I were such big fans of the Bushwhackers that we decided to dress up as Luke and Butch for Halloween. The possibility exists that in said photo, I am licking my younger brother's face to accurately imitate them. Unfortunately, this photo is in the hands of someone who will stop at nothing to embarrass me, but my mom doesn't have an account on the Torch or anything to scan the picture into her computer with. (Jeremy’s note: This can easily be found and posted.)

Jeremy responds: I loved the Big Bossman. I thought he was believable as Big Bossman as the crooked law enforcer and going back a little way and a character change to big Bubba Rogers. He looked like he could kick your ass. I really only liked him as a heel, so when he returned to Raw as Mr. McMahon’s head of security I was excited. Of course I was the only one who was excited but whatever. He provided some of the classic moments of the “Attitude Era.” Yes, I am referring to Pepper and the big nasty bastard angles. If this doesn’t do much how about this bomb shell, I was a big fan of Atom Bomb. The glasses and the finisher? I thought he was gold. Come on, he had a move called The Meltdown how can you not like that. Nevermind.

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