DEJ Experience District DEJ BLOG: Six Men vs. Beer and Hot Dogs Mar 13, 2008 - 11:28:48 PM

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Jason Powell posted a poll for visitors to ProWrestling.Net, asking whom they'd like to see take Jeff Hardy's place in the Money in the Bank match at WrestleMania. The poll led me to two convergent thoughts: I don't want to see any of those wrestlers take Jeff Hardy's spot and, as has been the case much more often then not, WWE lacks organically "grown" wrestlers that fans really connect with at a time when they could really use some.

See, Jeff Hardy always got a good reaction from the crowd, but in the last year and a half, approximately, fans were taking to him like a fish to water, reacting gleefully when success came his way, sulking when he fell short, and exciting them like almost no one else on the roster had been doing. And, shock of shocks, along came a drug... excuse me, Wellness Policy suspension, and a true fan favorite and a strong candidate for MITB winner and feel-good-WrestleMania-moment creator is now sitting on his couch, a black-light Bob Marley poster nailed to his wood-paneled wall behind him and the flicker of WrestleMania XXIV on the TV in front of him come March 30.

I certainly don't speak for every paying WWE fan, but of the six men remaining in the Money in the Bank match, I'm not exactly climbing the walls in hysteria of the thought of any of them winning the match. Don't get me wrong, I think Mr. Kennedy is great (even though lots of people don't), and I think CM Punk is the closest thing to a burgeoning babyface superstar WWE has right now. (For how many other wrestlers do little kids draw logos on posterboard? Very few, my friend.) And I doubt I need to sing the praises of Shelton Benjamin, but the obviousness of his lack of desire to break the glass ceiling is well-documented. But if Chris Jericho, Carlito, or MVP win, the only thing I'll jump out of my seat for would be to get another hot dog. ("Heavy on the onions... I know how you like them.")

Those six wrestlers really only inspire general apathy or disinterest -- for some it's rehashing the past, for others it's too little too late (I know a guaranteed title shot isn't supposed to be "little," but what kind of uninspired promo would Benjamin cut when challenging, um, Chavo Guerrero, for example, for his title?), and for some it would just be too contrived. I'm not ashamed to admit that when Mr. Kennedy won MITB last year, I jumped for joy. I can't see myself having that reaction for any of the aforementioned men.

And of the guys on Powell's poll... Paul London or Brian Kendrick? Who wouldn't love to see it, but who would really care? That loud "Huh?" you just heard eminated from most of the 90,000 people concentrated at the Citrus Bowl... Cody Rhodes? His tiny legs probably couldn't carry him up the ladder anyway... Jimmy Wang Yang? Absolutely, positively not, although I'd get 100 percent behind him if he came to the ring with ravioli stains on his already-filthy wife-beater (sorry, He Who Shan't Be Named)... Colin Delaney? Funny, but no... Tommy Dreamer? Not even funny... Val Venis, Stevie Richards or Elijah Burke? The modern-day Dwayne Gill, Barry Hardy and Dusty Wolfe would make WrestleMania look like a sham if they were even involved in the match.

I left out Matt Hardy because I don't know how many wrestlers WWE intends to have in this year's MITB, but whether there was one slot left or two, if Matt is healthy, he should absolutely be in the match. Would I pop if he came to the ring as a surprise entrant? Yes. Does that mean I want to see him win? No. And lest we forget the payday-collecting, Ron Paul-supporting Kane, who is probably the lamest choice of all, yet he's the most "qualified" of everyone on the roster to be involved in a match with a guaranteed title shot on the line. Unless he's entered into the 24-man battle royal for a shot at Chavo Guerrero's ECW Title (ugh, that's what's going to happen -- he's going to enter, win, and beat Chavo -- isn't it?), Kane makes the most sense as MITB Entrant No. 8... and he's the most indicative of the point I'm trying to make: WWE is quite full of wrestlers no one really cares about.

Maybe I'm generalizing too much, and maybe I'm projecting my own opinions on the majority of the fans, but I see with my own two eyes the lack of reaction for everyone in WWE who isn't John Cena, Jeff Hardy or Triple H. Even Shawn Michaels' pops are fizzling out, Ric Flair gets the sympathy reaction, and Undertaker's entrances and victories might receive the "Git 'Er Done" sleeveless screamfest.

But for the most part, WWE fans react with apathy to everyone else. And WWE has to make a No. 1 contender out of one of them. If anyone wants to Paypal me 7 dollars, I'll drink a beer to you as Not Jeff Hardy climbs the ladder for the win.

Eric Nelson is the "E" in the DEJ Experience. He hates that color orange... it looks like the puke inside a pumpkin. Look for Dusty's blog on Friday, Kevin's on Saturday, and Jeremy's on Sunday. The crew also fields your questions for Ask the Experience on Mondays, so submit your queries at the PWTorch.com VIP Forum, or e-mail them to theaudioexperience@gmail.com.

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